WE ARE THE YOUTH GONE WILD.

2008-10-18T04:32:00.001-07:00

i feel like shifting accounts.

maybe i will

:D

2008-10-14T04:40:00.000-07:00

todays not my day.
i spilled macaroni. someone's macaroni.
then a lunch box fell on that.
so yeah.
:)

i have tons of stuff to write but uhhh im so lazy la.
:)

birthday in ten days

annnnnnarchy

2008-10-10T05:32:00.000-07:00

sorry for not writing for a while!
my computer's completely broken down
so I won't be online for a while. A WHILE.
I'm at Suk han's place now she's in the SHOWERRR
nyehehehehe
I have so much things to write, but
I forgot everything.
Yeahhh.

Yeah so there's this kid , he's korean and in my school.
he slapped my ass.
HE'S 7 years old.
he slapped my ass.
sooo.
haha CALEB! he's hilarious. he's really corrupted.
he did this thing in front of Mr Robinson and mr robinson was like.. .......ok.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.
kay bye!
:D

anarchy!

2008-09-28T05:39:00.000-07:00

Its been 368 days, ever since I first well yeah. I shouldn't care.
And no I don't count dates okay!
Hahahaha. Anyways I shouldn't care anymore.

Was watching Channel E! (after a very long time) and watched this 25 love stuff gone wrong.
What made me cry was the one about Sid and Nancy. That was so tragic.

PUNK ROCK ROMEO AND JULIET.
anarchy!

Ahhhh Sid Vicious, I like him >:]
Yeah I know he's dead. He died in his sleep after a heroin overdose on February 2, 1979, four months after Nancy Spungen died. That's saddd ):
I know its almost 3 decades and now only I like him but who cares! :D My kids will like The Beatles or Led Zeppelin and stuff.

I can't wait for Hari Raya cos my dad says he'll give me some money to shop for clothes. I won't buy too expensive OKAY, OKAY. I'll just buy like.. some cheap stuff from this really cool shop I saw. Kinda indie :)

Getting a Science test tomorrow. STUDDDDYYY

:/ Everyone can't take the fact that I don't like anyone and I'm not into someone at all. Is it that strange?
I feel really free.

Yet the past still haunts my mind.

(not in a dramatic way!) XD

>:]

2008-09-24T05:49:00.000-07:00

hello.
today was a good day.
ahhh i was on my toes reading the poem.
and i was about to burst out laughing.
suki, luxmee and taiko were like "balkis.. you can do it! don't laugh don't laugh"
haha.
well i fell asleep while writing my test.. haha.
oh, and as i promised.

in maths class, all of us paying attention to our teacher teaching us.
until a strange problem just came out of the blue.
a friend of mine, Luxmee.

her bra was unhooked.
how? oh how?

she sat there. the embarrassment that she kept to herself.
she told us. she wanted to hook it back but the thing is,
there was this unicorn behind us. with a really really big HORN.
we waited until he was gone, but he was never to leave.

once this big HORN unicorn left,
she finally got it hooked.
lucky girl.

hm not much other than that.
goooooodbye

om nom nom

2008-09-22T06:13:00.000-07:00

mr hurley: when is twilight?
me: DECEMBER!!

always listen in class and get your mind off the Twilight books.

me: wo yer ke ni xue ciao
zul: >:O

always think before you speak chinese words.

today was okay.
well my internet got disconnected several times.
and my computer froze.

so yeah.

made some maldivo malvido cookiethattastelikenut thingamajig

yeah and stuff.
i'm so lazy.

pictures

2008-09-20T00:10:00.000-07:00

PICTURES! :)

i'm having a fight with some annoying girl

was all nice to me

then said some bitching stuff to my friend who told me.

ur tooooooo ugly to b fucked up by me! says:
fuck u cb kia mthr fucker
ur tooooooo ugly to b fucked up by me! says:
sohai
ur tooooooo ugly to b fucked up by me! says:
mahai
☂rachhhh™ says:
what the fuck
☂rachhhh™ says:
hey mother fucker i know you want a stick to be shoved up your ass
___ ____ never liked you so why the fuck do you have to bother her
she has like so much work to do and some stupid fuckin 11 year old has to bother her
☂rachhhh™ says:
YOURE NOTE EVEN CHINESE
☂rachhhh™ says:
oh and running to your mom about it just shows your a pussy
☂rachhhh™ says:
HAM KA CHAN

hmm

2008-09-17T07:33:00.000-07:00

well soo.
i suddenly regreting like having all these blog posts.
i don't know why.
i feel like deleting my blog.
hmm nevermind.

so yesterday i went to suk han's house.
after school to sleep over, and sadly we did not take pictures at all because.
well yeah because.
slept over and yeah many many things..
and the next day was a pool party.
went to sierramas west club by car, down and up.
then coincidentally met Farris, called Nick, met Abishek, met Farris.
went to Sierramas West club with Farris and Amir.
went back up.
gave up on Sierramas west so had a party in Villamas.
like, 7 people showed up.
skip many things.
a girl crushing on Izzy (because to her, he is cute and funny)
a girl shooting Izzy, Taiko and Avi.
went to play ground.
sat on the see saw with Taiko and Suki.
Izzy kinda sweared because a little girl spat at him.
But he didn't say it out loud, but a man heard.
He didn't look so happy.
Like the "whats these teenagers doing in a playground being very ____"
so I saw and ran off with Suki, Taiko and Izzy.
We hung out at many places.
Made a song called "Boulevard of Suk Han's Dreams"
And talked about many things.
Then Taiko, Izzy and Avi went home
Ate Pan Mee. Monia went home with her beloved toast.
Then yeah stuff. Then I went home.
Hmmm.
Fun day :)

ehehe

2008-09-15T02:53:00.001-07:00

i'm so sleepy now.
i feel like sleeping.
): i want to sleeppppp.
have a science and ict test tomorrow.
hope i pass, so i'm gonna study soon. (:
yeah so when i dyed my hair that time.
i dyed it black.
NOT KNOWING I NEED THAT HAIRDYE SHAMPOO!
my black is fading a bit, so its like a little orange streaks here and there in the sun.
maybe i can pass up a letter "dear teacher, the reason of balkis's hair is that the peroxide went mad." or or the black dye was stupid. or the lady didnt' do it properly.
ahhh i don't care la -.-

hmmm should i or should i not?
i don't wanna wanna get hurt

2 in th morning

2008-09-13T10:53:00.000-07:00

haha , uhm kay soo.
its 1.53 am , Sunday and I haven't started my homework.
ughh shizz, i hate it when I'm given loads of homework.
but anyways, I have to work with it.
I hate it when people complain so much.
I mean like whine. In a "i have so much homework i'm gonna dieee" way.
Like dude, shut the fuck up man.
Agh.

And I hate it when I'm treated in a way that I really hate.
Like I said in many things, I'm not all about hyper active-ness.
And its not that I want to be an attention whore or anything..
but I really hate it when she wants it all to be about herself.
This isn't a moment about bitching.
I mean for once, stop bleeding on the dancefloor.
The dancefloor is made for you to dance.
We're all bleeding, but we're still dancing.
So why?

I hate kiss ups.
They get more credit than the people who work hard for it.

And when I listen to their fairy tales I pretend to be happy and excited.
When all I want is to have one like that.

And I hate it when they treat me like I'm dumb.
With that face when they tell me something.
I mean, in a way, I mean most of the words I say.

:(

I have 3904230482309483 feelings.
I don't want to be an attention whore so its not my fault I don't show it all as much as you do.

And its not like you have the worst problems in this world.
Look at those people who fight to survive, and you, who has everything, just wants to die.
Kwashikor, AIDS, Cancer, HIV, all those diseases.
It hurts more than a broken heart.
I'm not saying I don't care, I really do care.
And at least you have friends unlike the kids who have AIDS.

Although I cry over small matters.
I have a heart.
I have a brain.
So treating me like I'm dumb.
Because I'm not dumb.
I have feelings. I can cry, I can smile, I can get angry.

I can fall in love too

poem

2008-09-11T07:52:00.001-07:00

if she looks away when you make eye contact, she likes you.
if she smiles too awkwardly, she likes you.
if she is more hyper than usual, she likes you.
if she can't seem to swallow in her food in front of you, she likes you.
if she has friends who smile when you're nearby, she likes you.

if she cares about you,
she likes you.

-wendy hartley

9/11

2008-09-11T07:34:00.000-07:00

ahh sooo.
i like drama with Ms Mulcavage. She's so nice.
And I think she's really pretty :)
she has piercing eyes.
drama is funfunfun.
chess is interesting.
hmmm.
today is 9/11 ):
depressing day for those people.
yellow day is tomorrow.
I'm wearing this yellow shirt I bought from nichi's
and pe shorts.
because choice no.2 is grey cullotes.
=_=
yeah as if i'll wear that.
doing hw on piano concertooo
hmmmmm

i think being friends with you is better than whatever i've wanted.
that's all thats gonna happen anyway.

tee hee

2008-09-08T16:00:00.000-07:00

sooo its 7 am.
i should be getting ready for school now.
WAIT GIVE ME 5 MORE MINUTES!
i don't think i will like Tuesday.
I have 3 classes to sleep in.
:P
But really, the teacher's so boring
=o=
They either talk too soft, or too slow, OR TOO BORING.
eheheheh. :)
Fashion sounds reallyyy funnnnn.
Ms Linda is Mr Hurley's wife.
I just figured that out.
They have blonde kids.
Cos they're both blonde!
Their kids probably go to Alice Smith or something.
Who knows.
Their daughter's such a camera whore.
hahahhaa Mr Hurley told us.
He had to delete 5000 pictures of her doing the same pose.
In one party. ONE PARTY AND 5000 PICTURES TAKEN.
ohhh WOW.
hahahahhaa.
I've been eating so much.
Maybe I'll do some jogging this evening.
Before breaking fast : )

OK I HAVE 2 MORE MINUTES TO WRITE!
Soooo
I havent been writing long posts lately.
So you all will be crying because you want to read essays am I right?
Wrong.
WWWHHHATT?
Ok forgive me for writing to myself but right now I feel hyper.
On milo.
SPEAKING OF MILO.
I was drinking it then we heard the guy and we had to stop drinking and start fasting.
I didn't get to finish that cool cup of Milo I made.
SPEAKING OF MILO AGAIN.
MY MOM KEEPS BUYING THE MILO PACKET WITH CASPER ON IT.
does she have a crush on him?
just kidddinnnggg.

tireddddddddddddd

2008-09-08T03:04:00.000-07:00

...
so i'm listening to nevershoutnever! & Stereo Skyline.
I'm sooooooooo tired my legs are all cramped.
Feel like SLEEPINNNNN.
textiles was interesting. english was funny. malay with zul was ok. maths was ok.
yeahhhhhh.
ohmygod, YOUKNOWWHAT?!
i woke up at 8 am, reached school at 8:30.
i went upstairs to go to class and like no one was there and i was like..SHIT!
where was everyonee.
so i sat in the toilet.
i got pissed off because they were talking for so long.
so i went to the whole school assembly where the teacher was still talking
and i'm like.... :D
hhahhaaha.
i want cheese.
sophie brought me some chocolate, (Rocky Road) and a lollipop
><
and she's going to SAN FRANSISCO this December holidays.
getting me a late birthday present, THE MEDIC DROID ALBUMMM<3
ahhh i love yoou Sophie!
she gets freaked out when i say that o_0
oh well, she's still cool (:

butterflies when i see you

my saving grace

2008-09-06T07:01:00.000-07:00

poser: i'm emo. see look at my cuts.
suki: uh...emo's dont admit they're emo.
poser: well...i'm not emo.
suki: they don't even admit they cut.
poser: well..i don't cut.

HAHAHAH there's this annoying girl who thinks she's emo and thats what happened.
and and

poser: i hate balkis's hair (dyed one)
suki: i like it.
poser: well its ok.
suki: i like it
poser: i kinda like it
suki: i like it
poser: yeah i really like her hair its nice.

what an idiot. hahah.

anyways
i'm so bored. whatttt to do.
i like you alot.
but i don't expect anything.
i really do like you alot i think.
i don't know.

ihdgdrhg;rd

2008-09-05T07:26:00.000-07:00

so uh yeah
i feel great and happy
but i feel like an idiot
yet i feel great and happy
people read my blog so i'm not saying anything
its like that feeling when you let out something that was bottled up for months
and i mean 7 months.
and i let it out
and i feel good :)
if you know, shush. if you don't dont bother.

mr mongoose and mrs hen is the most emo story i read so far :(

:(

2008-09-04T08:42:00.000-07:00

yes why the sad face.
BECAUSE I DIDNT GET FASHION CLUB.
WHY?
because i didnt see it!
and i wanted to join it!
but i didnt see it!
so i'm in drama club.
AND CHESS.
why chess?
because MR LOO CANCELED A FEW PLACES SO WE CHANGED.
sigh ...story of my life.
oh yeah that reminds me i watched The Love Guru at 5 am :P
explains why I doze off in every class (+ ART)

grrr i told everyone i lost interest.
which i did.
and interest is growing back!
NOT GOOD!
oh i'll like someone else! YEAH GREATTTT IDEA!

school

2008-09-03T02:51:00.000-07:00

yeah so today was our first day of school.
all the boys got excited when they saw those 2 new girls
who brought phones to school and wore alot of makeup
they probably don't know the rules here sooo yeah
hahaha you should've heard how rudy and zakri were talking like when they passed by
hilariousss.
and i got pulled out for wearing a sweater ):
me and suki.
today didnt go that well for me.
hopefully tomorrow will be better.
my mom's baking vanilla cake and my cute little brother is making royal icing :)
and my evil older brother is making pasta.
while i'm sitting here.
i'm tired!

i lost interest in him.
& no one believes me.

=.=

2008-09-01T05:35:00.000-07:00

my mom didn't let me go last minute.
i really wanted to gooooooooo.
sorry mitch! and others!
didn't get to Babylon AD :(
:'(
sighhh.
mommy gets annoying ..

i hope i haven't hurt or irritated anyone.
i just have that feeling.
:/

school starts day after tomorrow.
not feeling excited anymore.

so,

2008-08-31T12:09:00.000-07:00

what really suprised me.
1. tomorrow is fasting month.
2. mitch thought i was chinese the whole while i knew him.
3. i'm going to the curve tomorrow (stalkers?)

kay maybe just no.2 that suprised me. do i look chinese to you people? :/
sometimes i don't know why people bother.
yeah so i got to chapter 4 of twilight. its more than 500 pages long, and its pretty good :)
yeah i got in the Twilight black whole. shoot me.
:)

watching Babylon Ad tomorrow. Sounds exciting.
urgh I love reading stories about Vampires! Twilight's not the only one..
aha. soo.
I don't think I like him anymore . :/
I don't know. I shouldn't talk to much cos I don't want anything to spread or whatever .

My mom was talking to me about piercings. She's starting to get worried about me having them. Well yeah I get them when I'm alone and I hardly bring my IC. :P Cos her sister fainted long ago when she got it, so I guess my mom was worried if I got it alone. She doesnt' want me to get it alone, well she doesn't even want me to get anymore.
I won't. After I get a belly or tongue pierced. :P
Just kidding.

Getting my hair black on Tuesday.

whistle for the choir

2008-08-30T00:26:00.000-07:00

ahhh loving The Fratellis again. :]
their song whistle for the choir is so cute .
it was in Juno i think.

so I went to One U with my mom and I kinda shopped alot. /._.\
she likes the Superman shirt so she's getting it for me sometime soon
can'tttt wait to get it.

oh and I got a tote bag with badges to put on. I'm in love with the shop Deeper and Harder.
but its tiny who cares. cheap and nice. :)
andddd i got Twilight book because it sounds so good. my mom liked the cover so she got it fer me.
my little brother got his little toys and yeah.

my mom is a Zara freak (so yeah i kinda grew up with Zara) so we went there.
I'm in love with the electric blue coloured skinny jeans. :D
and the one with some prints.
The shirt in Topshop is loveddddd :D

oh and there was this freak lady wearing a hick shirt (i think she's drunk) because she kept screaming and she shouted at my ear. I was so close to telling her off. Gosh.
I'm fasting today so I can't believe I surveved One Utama not eating. Haha.

I saw a friend of mine so I was talking to her. Then I turned around and I saw Sofia Hanim who was in our school, she left in Year 5. She couldn't remember me, but her sister (who i never knew) did. 0______o;;
So yeah pretty cool day I had today.
I entertain you readers wayyyyyyyyyyyy too much.
I didn't know alot of people knew my blog.
Okay enough, BYE!

adhya

2008-08-28T23:39:00.000-07:00

tagged by Adhya. :D

1. The person who tagged you is-
Adhya :D
2. Your relationship with him/her is .
-classmates
3. Your five impression of him/her .
-nice, funny, cool, tall, interesting
.4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you?
hmmm...talk bout Zul?
5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you.-
smething about Zul
6.If he/she become your lover, you will .
-I'm a straighto
7. If he/she become your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be .
- be a man. haha nah im straight.
8. If he/she become your enemy, you will .
she's too nice to be my enemy, really.
9. If he/she become your enemy, the reason will be.
-idk, too nice to be enemies
10. The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is .
talk bout Zul (:
11. Your overall impression of him/her is .
-She's really nice
12. How do you think people around you will feel about you
.-Weird & Random
13. The characters you love of yourself are .
-i'm friendly, i'm weird and i don't care what people say about that, i love drawing, i'm not like most girls
14.On the contrary, the characteristics you hate most abt yourself are.
-what people say about me
15. The most ideal person you want to be is .
-I dont know
16. For people that care and like you, say something to them .
-ILY (:
17. Pass this quiz to 4 persons that you wished to know how they feel about you pass to people that have blog only.
1. Jacintha Yap
2. Alex Shiew?
3. Dara Kelly
4. Adhya

18.Who is no.1 having relationship with?
i wish it was you know, but i cant say hehe
19. Is no.3 a male or female?
girl
20. If no.2 and 4 are together, will it be a good thing?
hehe; maybe : )
22. What is no.2 studying about?
idk; youtube
23. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3
a week ago?
24. What kind of music band does no.1 like?
probably punk rock; undergroundd.
25. Does no.1 have any siblings?
Yep
26. Will you woo no.3?
hah, no
27.How about no.2?
nahh
28. Is no.4 single?
i guess
29. What is the surname of no.3?
Davis
30.What’s the hobby of no.1?
Chatting, blogging? Idk

yeahhhhhhh. going to school soon

hxc slumber?

2008-08-28T08:45:00.000-07:00

yeah so yesterday Luxmee came over.
we live nearby so yeah.
I'm getting my school books tomorrow.
turns out I'm in the same class as Luxmee & Suk Han.
But Sophie's gonna be alone, which I'm really worried about ):
I want her to move to my class ! :D
but I don't think they'll allow that anymore, do they?
not sure.
My hair's not full black yet; imagine if the teacher sees me tomorrow.
I'll like wear a hoodie or something . To cover .
Oh right out of the point; the SLEEPOVER!

So at first, Luxmee was INTIMIDATED by my older brother.
I'm not so suprised because it happened to Suk han and others.
But later on , you get addicted to talking to him. He's a year older than me.
He has 4 guys who are obsessed with talking to him. 2 guys who come everyday..
Yeah. But there's one who I really like (well he's hot so,) but his friend who is one of those guys FORBID him because he well...
I shouldnt be talking about guys obsessing with talking to their guy friends (which sounds gay, but really its not.)

I started talking to Luxmee from 8pm to about, 2-3am? Then we spoke to my brother until 7 am somewhere there. Had breakfast, played guitar hero, went on the computer, gossiped for a while.

then we slept at 10 am. :D
then we woke up at 1pm, played the computer until 4pm. Then we woke up my older brother and annoyed him and told him that his 'wife' (one of the guys who love to talk to him) knocked the door. And my brother seemed scared. Its true, even I'm obsessed to talk to him. :D

Many phone calls to my brother to go play football, so Luxmee & I walked my brother down. Apparently, Luxmee wanted to find out how one of the guys look like, and she says its the body. TOO LOUD, which is true. But hilarious.

So we went back. Took Luxmee's stuff, and I walked her home. We watched the beautiful scenery of the rainbow which is cool. Then she walked home, I walked home.
And now I'm right here.
:D

I need alot of stick for my ear holes.

Pingu is my bitch and Pikachu is my whore.

fairy tales

2008-08-26T11:11:00.000-07:00

Peter Pan!
---

Dear Peter, take me away.
take me so very far away,
to your never neverland,
so that i will never ever have to grow up.

My Dearest Peter Pan,
let me kiss the stars with you.
Let me kiss your rosy lips,
and let the stars witness my devotion
to the never-ending loveof my childhood.

My Dearest Peter,
i'm still waiting for you
to come through my window,
just as you did when i was a young babe.

Dear Mr. Pan,
i've waited and waited,
and i watch my window every night just in hopes
that i'll see your mischevious shadow
lurking in on me,
as he did in those long ago days.

To My Dearest Mr. Peter Pan,
I don't think you're coming.
I've started to give up all hope
of ever seeing you again.
Never again will I be able to caress your hand or kiss your soft lips.
I suppose this is where I say,
growing up can't be all bad.
Right? I wish i could, but i can't without lying to you.

This is addressed to a Mr. Peter Pan,
in hopes that someday,
he will come and sweep me off my feet.
I suppose that will only happen in my dreams.
But, I am a dreamer, and I think that's all I'll ever be.

-wendy

---

oh my, i remembered quite long ago, i had a crush on Peter pan :P
i dont like his eyebrows though. (cartoon one i mean)
ahahaha. Oh, and the prince in Sleeping Beauty. used to like him too
(I WAS REALLY YOUNG OKAY)
I wanna watch Peter Pan and Robin Hood again
:D

grrr I wish Wendy like stayed with Peter Pan..
but in the end she like went off and married some dude
hate her. :( ok just kidding.
i love fairy tales yet i stay in reality.
i guess they just exist in dreams.
and thoughts.

i just had another wishful thinking.
vindicated love;

randoms

2008-08-24T00:41:00.000-07:00

CUTE BABY :D

dude whatthefuck how small is my world getting?
i'd explain but i think i shouldn't. hahah.
watched the music video of Pray for the Plagues by Bring Me The Horizon..
and DAMNNITTT freaky video lots of screamo really metal.
i just came back from my dad's kampung so tiring 2 hour drive.
aiyooo =_=

well yeah not much things going on...
was talking to Luxmee on the phone.
ahaha.

oh yeah, I got two new piercings.
:)
one of them kinda hurts..because i just found out its the bone i pierced.
AND THEN THAT THE LADY DIDN'T MAKE ME SIT DOWN
I GOT MY EARS PIERCED WHEN I WAS STANDING UP!
aiyooo. -.-

OK THE END! :)

a new world

2008-08-16T05:09:00.000-07:00

well not so new. i've been really busy again.
on wednesday i left to dear luxmee's house for the
slumber summer sonic sleepover.
it was awesome. like fucking awesome.
we watched movies from 6.30 pm to 6.30 am.
and sat on the roof drinking *ALCOHOL* COUGH
we watched
-8 episodes of gossip girl
-ten things i hate about you (RIP HEATH LEDGER I LOVE YOU)
-prince & me
-SUPERBADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
hahahahahaha
really funny

me: hey, there are old women walking by. they should notice us up here. look at us LOOK AT US! BITCHHHHHHHHHHHHH

and we tried to attempt talking like Seth from Superbad.
EVANS IS SO FISHING INNOCENT.
ohyeah then we extended it so i slept over another night.
we watched What happens in Vegas. it ended at 2am.
then we had a heart to heart talk, full of tears, pain happiness all that drama for about 4 hours?
i told alot of truth.
then we woke up at 11, and my mom called SAYING THAT WHEN SHE PICKS ME UP IM GONNA GO HOME TO PACK UP FOR A ROAD TRIP TO TAIPING.
so now i'm in my mom's cousin's house. its like a kampung village house but they extended this rad studio thing. they have awesome digital SLR cameras, records, AND THIS COMPUTER.

i'm living my life right now.

yet i have mixed feelings and i'm scared.

poison

2008-08-09T00:40:00.000-07:00

i haven't updated this blog. i have been very busy.
the whole week i mean, so i don't have time to write out personal things when my friends are behind me or something.
monday- suk han came over and slept over
tuesday- went to cineleisure with sukhan, monia, chris, sophie, izzy to watch midnight meat train (its good :D)
wednesday- went to Sophie's place and slept over
thursday- slept over another night and nicole richardson<3came over too :D

friday- woke up and went to suk han's house to help set up her little brother's birthday.

see i have been busy. :)

i am bugged and annoyed by three people. i won't say who they are because...yeah

and yes one of them i really am angry at her. i cannot believe you. and what you did that made her cry.
i'm not only angry at you because of her. i have so many other reasons.

WHO ARE YOU.

you are nice. but you're not nice when i get closer to you.
you are selfish. admit that.
oh and we didn't ditch you. you ditched us. fyi, we're getting back at you.

we never hated you. you only used us sometimes and when your friends come you just walk off, like we're statues and 'we won't care'. We did care when you were gone, but now we don't. We just got sick of it.

-you ditched us. you didn't care about us at all.
-you broke my best friends heart.
-you stole my friend's most precious thing.

what more do you want?

oh, and by the way, if you're reading, don't go complaining 'i'm trying to be happy you ruined my day' because i don't care about your fucking day. your fucking day isn't meant to be happy because you already ruined everyone's fucking day don't forget you made my fucking brother cry you fucking bitch

when i started talking to you i thought you changed.
but you didn't.

you always want things YOUR way and not everyone's.
i hate it i hate it I HATE YOU GO DIE

go and sit in the corner and cry and write your rants in your blog. i'm not gonna care because you made so many people sit in the corner and cry.

you did it to me too.

no.2

and you, the other you. i don't know you.
the only times we talk to each other is when you're treating me that way.
i don't like it.

i'm not a fucking doll that won't fight back because i do, so shut your mother fucking trap.
and you treat others so well and what about me? who am i to you?
never mind about you.

i'm just so annoyed. if you two are reading this, read. its for you and i'm really angry at no.1.

"i told you i hate alot but nooo you didn't listen to me."

i don't want anything your way.

I WOULDN'T CARE, AND YOU CAN LEAVE AS WELL BECAUSE I THINK WE ALL WOULDN'T BE CONTROLLED, OR ANY OF WHAT WE WENT THROUGH.

oh by the way, you were the reason why CARBSS dissolved.
it was your fault the whole way. it wasn't their fault it was YOUR fault.
you made two of them against you bringing me along.
then you broke his heart. what else?

its CRBSS now.
the new you killed the old you.
you never noticed how you changed.

x

i do

2008-08-03T01:01:00.000-07:00

lets be

C O L O U R F U L

we be who we want to be.
not what you want to see.

choose where you want to stand.
show where you can't fall.

acceptance.
accept us for who we are. fat, gay, slim, les, bi.

i believe in true love & true happiness.

i believe that there is the end of the world.

just because you smile all the time;
doesn't mean you have a happy life.

hold on, if you feel like letting go.
because
there's better than you know.

think<3

2008-08-01T08:50:00.000-07:00

sooo.
just a little update of todayyy.
luxmee's coming over and we're gonna camerawhore in the park!
ahah :D
i love herrrr she's hilarious! seriouslyy
well i love all of my friends<3
might go watch Wall.E soon...
or The Mummy
i don't know.
ehhh too lazy to write...bye

me

2008-07-26T06:56:00.000-07:00

sorry another post today.

i'm thinking of being vegetarian for a week. might work you know!
the only meat i like is chicken or fish. but i hardly eat them because i easily get sick of them.
and, i hate lamb and beef. and goat. well all those edible meat!
its just sooooo HARD AND DISGUSTINGG
yes Suk Han go cry! I'm wasting my beef-eating days.
i probably hate lamb because i watched Black Sheep. Its not scary but its gory and I lost my appetite in red-colored meat (eg: Lamb/Beef)

i watched Little Miss Sunshine (again) today.
hehe it was funnyyyy.
i bought pants today. Yay.
and my mom says I can dye my hair on Monday!
I'm thinking of brown on top, black at the bottom with a little bit of blue and purple streaks.
I don't know. Help me?

I think I wanna go to One Utama on Wednesday.
Don't know why. Just really bored.
Oh I should go to KLCC on Tuesday!
Hehehehe :D
I think I know what top I want from Zara. Hehehe.
:/

bye

oh em gee

2008-07-25T20:13:00.000-07:00

i really ran out of things to write on my blog these days.
i just baked a blueberry cheesecake. i honestly don't like blueberry.
yes, i'm sorry bluberry fans.
my dad gave me 200 bucks to spend for like my holiday.
i can't wait to spend it.
yes hot stufffffff i'm gonna go shop til i drop.
okay maybe not.
like i had this dream where my ears were full of piercings.
and i had to hide from ms sheela.
hahahaah i was scared there.
i had like seven on the left and eight on the right.
and i think i had snakebites or a monroe.
i prefer snakebites more than a monroe.
my mom doesn't really mind me getting piercings.
she says that as long its style and doesn't ABUSE my body she doesn't mind.
and she was a goth kid in her youth days so yeah.

wait i gotta go to the toilet be right back...
i am back.
aha.

i'm bored. i wanna go out or something.
oh right, my exam results (bad)

art - 80%
music- 77%
maths - 64% (i think)
english - 53% SHIT
history - 55%
malay -67% (i think)
geography- 64%
sciene - 58% fuckkkk
ict - 77%
ugama - 75% yesh

and we got the yearbook! haha i'm in the homestay page where it says it doesn't work!
hahahahahah i just stood there when it dropeed because i got so pissed.
i'm in the background alot so yeah.
i look gay in the class pictures! :(
okay i'm bored. bye

:)

2008-07-23T08:16:00.000-07:00

today was a fun day.
I WATCHED BATMAN. HE IS COOL :O
well of course, i mean he WAS my first ever role model (besides Britney)
batman is like batttt :O
but i like joker better. he's chillll
the freak-ish part was when he told the story about why he got his scars.
the movie was fucking two and a half hours long! i was gonna die.
well actually gonna piss, but sophie & i (well just me) will never miss a part in Batman.
i watched all his movies :D
well i asked my friends if they wanna follow me go pierce belly or (if ever can find) tongue or something.
but they're CLEAN :(
well as in piercings clean. they think they have NORMAL ears and I don't.
i think i want a new one soon. :P
tempted to get a tongue/belly/snakebite/nose
:P
AHHHH
sometimes i don't know why guys be all jerk to the girl that likes them.
NO THIS ISN'T ABOUT ME.
one of my friends.
MY ONE IS NOT A JERK.
:P
AHHHH
oh i saw ALOT of people i know or at my school today.
i'll list.
-Robert & Micheal Kelly
-Rahul (now in ASS)
-Ariane
-Andrew Chua (graduate)
-Seo Hee & Samantha
-Monica & whatshisname

IT IS ALOT.....i think.
SEO HEE WAS WEARING A ZARA JACKET! I'M GONNA KILL HER
(watch out haha)

oh i played pool
i got 5 BALLS in! I'm awesome!
hahaha well I REALLY suck at pool.
:P
i was talking to Chua throughout the whole movie.
and reuben says we were pretty loud.
haha some guy was clapping and Rudy was like SHUT UP and we were like RUDY!!
then in the movie it was like -SILENCE- then chua said out loud WHAT THE FF--FISH
hahahahaah.
i was pretty high in the beginning.
tomorrow last day of school.
NOT EXCITED AT ALL.
:/

kay so about the talent time yesterday...hahahahaah.
wait memory refresh =___________________=
OH YEAH
yeah so when Sita & Luxmee were singing their songs..
I'm not a mainstream kid at all.
They were singing some "When I close my eyes you're the one I see" someshit
like at the beginning I said out loud (well not so loud)
WHO SANG THIS SONG AGAIN?
or was it
WHATS THE NAME OF THIS SONG?
then when Seo Hee sang Taylor Swift (monia had to tell me)
I was like
UHHH Monia...who sang this song and whats the name?
:P
SOMEONE TEACH ME MAINSTREAMNESS!

my first ever bands were Paramore and Avenged Sevenfold.
I knew Paramore about 2-3 years ago.
AWESOME :D

hahaha.
& We The Kings is famous when I found it last year.

Well you know, non-mainstream/underground band kids are like this WHEN THEIR BELOVED MUSIC BECOMES MAINSTREAMED.
TT_____TT

oh i was watching Kunal's youtube thingy ohh and chris was on hahahaha
ew edward.

that guy still gives me the creeps.
EEEEEEEK.

well anyway.
:]
uh.
:) (: :] [: :} {:
kay my lil bro is telling me another lame joke.
HAHA he is soo adorable.

.....

i hope he (not the guy i like) isn't angry at me anymore.
:(
kinda miss those old times.
sorry

tuesdays

2008-07-22T03:50:00.000-07:00

hah, today was fun. :)
its our second last day of school :( & i'm not excited.
why? because:
-wont get to see my friends
-wont get to take in the streets with ZUL
-wont get to see him
-wont get to CHYEAHHH

i'm going to 1U tomorrow to watch Batman with Suk Han, Sophie, Reuben & company.
you know BATMAN.
so anyone wanna purposely meet me in coincidence? :D
hah.
i'm bringing home made chocolate-chip cookies on Thursday.

today was really fun. well we first got to play basketball. i played at like one of the last few matches (where the last point was thanks to me :]). well actually when we were playing i was just slacking lah...then he came i'm like ho shit cannot look like boring fat slacker so i go take the ball..then SHOOT ball go in basket. :D

what happened then...
oh then we went for break. nothing special...
except suk han i tell you, so stress. :/

Talent time haha. Monia & I cheering hardcore.
we both sat at the front so the primary kids got pissed at our non-stop shouting.
well first was Luxmee & Sita's song (they were mc)
yeah they were gooooooooooooooood. :)
then it was Noah but i had to follow Monia toilet.
then was Seo Hee she's really good.
then it was the Shuffle kid. he's cool :O
then break
thank god i never and never ever bought a drink from interact club.
why?
oh you don't wanna know.

then it was DE CHALMER'S band :)
poor chris. at his performance the microphone had to be a dick.
the maintainannence guy was like fixing the microphone...when chris was signing.
like you know grabbing it and stuff.
poor chris
he was about to kick him. hah,
yeah so after that arinah screamed CHRISTOPHER, monia screamed BENJAMIN and i screamed CHALMERS
owh yeah we're hardcoree HAHA.

next was the KERRR.
yes we all grabbed his leg and screamed his name.
yes KER, you have hardcore fans!
THE KER THE JEN THE HO!

then was Gareth from Year 7. yeah he was coooooool.

then was Yuen Mei (with background music)

then THE KER again =.= . yeah we grabbed his leg again.

then was Ashley's band. we all screamed Chua, Chuachipoo, Ashley & Camelcars.
huahuahuahua.
they were awesome. but why oh why did they have to sings the kinds of songs that make me down? :(
LOL joking..but yeah i was tearing...A BIT :
never mind no one should care about me!

so yeah then it was Orchestra then.

OH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT- Jason, Avi, Daniel & Joshyy!
haha they were awesome! they were dancing to Ok Go! I love that band!
they were really good! especially the matrix mode.
HAHA SEXXXXYYYYY!
they look like The Beatles + The Click Five.
Joshua borrowed Mr Robinson's tie. =.=
Of course towards the end we all danced together to them.
seemed like a huge rave going on.

he's good with little kids. i saw.
i mean uhhh......

so i think i'll go get a new piercing tomorrow..

you make my heart skip a beat`

2008-07-21T05:03:00.001-07:00

okay wwhat?
ugh. school is soo boring now. well summer's coming up and i really can't wait to dye my hair :)
i bought the hair dye but i have no idea when i should do it... :D
okay SO.

why do you always act like you're a trend setter?
you're not, okay?
yeah i'm an asshole. i'm a copycat.
what about you? you used to be so nice.
now you're just a sensitive asshole jerk.
i'm really down about this.
you didn't start the 'write your name all over the blahblah'
people always did it.
loser.
yeah you hear me,
the whole while you hated me like shit, i never did anything to you.
i just wanted to get to your good side but when i did.
you're just a sensitive. sore loser. jerk. asshole.
hear that.
:)

sooo. today the whole world wide kids came to school and we had to take care of them
i thought some girl piano, she's malay.
then these kids were to sit in a circle but they didn't listen until i called them to :)
hehehe.
LOL.
i'm so self obsessed.
(well not really) shite i got the hiccups again.

ehhh i saw todayyy.
he had a paintball injury and it looked so bruise..and deep. :(
LOL i sound so.
yeah.

i hate facebook profiles that lags my computer.
mine was so i deleted so much applications.

listening to Aiden. its not bad :]
it takes me so long to post this.
i had this blog window opened for an hour ago..

2008-07-20T04:27:00.000-07:00

i'm really bored... no one is updating their blog :X
come on all you viewers...UPDATE
so i made some Apple Crumble today (ah Sophie)
and it tastes AWESOMEEE
i wanna make more tomorrow. :)
my mom's getting crazy over baking. she bakes a cake like everyday and my 'evil' uncle finishes it.
HAHAHAHA
sorry.
i'm so good at scaring people :P
me: chris i have a confession
chris: what :)
me: I........... (chris didnt read the bottom part cos well its down bottom)
chris: yea?
me: DIDNT YOU SCROLL DOWN =.=

it says
I..... am not in the restaurant :P

cos i told him i was in the restaurant he was in.
sorry chris, it was funny i was laughing a lot and my parents were like, "what are you doing"
so i was like
"uh....watching Chua's videos... i put em in my phone."

this coming week is the last week of Year 8. And I don't seem so excited :X
Its time to live 2 or more months without you. I've never had a summer missing someone.
(well its probably because I didn't like anyone in any of my summers.)

party day is coming. what should i bring? :/ maybe i'll say
"i'm bringing cds" yeah. that would work :D

so i downloaded some new music. I'm really liking:
-Marilyn Manson
-Aiden
-Mindless Self Indulgence
-The Tings Tings (its mainstream; i think)

yeah....I don't listen to mainstream at all these days. :P

Nine O Clock. YES. CSI NY the show I missed cos of the gay politics. :(
i mean.
nevermind.

tomorrow is a Monday and I feel slightly excited. I don't know why :X
well....
see you all soon!
love

hung out at sophie's

2008-07-18T18:24:00.000-07:00

OH SHE'S A LION

EW ME

haha
i went to Sophie's house yesterday. it was fun
AHHA i remembered.

me: i don't get why people say "life is like a box of chocolates, you don't know what you're gonna get."
sarah: how can you not get that?
me: i mean if you are holding a CADBURY box of chocolate, of course you'd know!
everyone bursts out laughing

me: hey sarah, you're doing architecture courses right?

sarah: yeah

me: then why are you drawing a pineapple?

everyone bursts out laughing

sarah: i wanna draw Spongebob's house!

me: so you ARE doing architecture on pineapples.

yeah soooo....summer's coming soon...and i don't feel excited. its like i don't want summer yet i want it. ARGH.

bye

YES

2008-07-17T07:55:00.001-07:00

YES.
wait what?
hahahahahaaha.
i wanna new piercing!! but the one i just got hasn't like..been a week yet.
fuckit my internet explorer doesn't work so i have to use gay firefox.
like they have SPELLING ERRORS TOO.
OH EM GEEEEEEEE.
hahahaahah i sound so WEIRD.
yes i am weird.
soo i brought cheesecake to school today. for cooking club :)
Ms Malini feels GUILTY for underestimating ME!
hahaha all you teachers who looked down on me...I GOT SOMETHING. CHEESECAKE!
so the one i saved for Chris, SIGH, nearly got stolen by Sita.
she ran around the whole fucking court with it. me & Luxmee stopped her. wew.
well i saved the cake cos well Chris was down in the dumps so i saved it fer him :]
YES IMA GOOD SISTER SEEEEEE ALL OF YOU BIOLOGICAL EFFING BROTHERS OF MINE DON'T APPRECIATE MY CARE!
hhahahaahahahahah.
okay.
uhhhhhhhh?
so Sophie didn't come to school today. Her dad wanted to spend time with her so he asked her to skip school. WOW hhahaha. Wish my parents were like that.
mmmm.
you know he looks better from far.
he looks cute nearby.
HAHAHAHA STOP OMG I SOUND LIKE A PERV
speaking of perv.....ahhaha there was this cute little korean boy with huge curly hair
so here's the dialogue

me: HEY what's your name?
boy: nothing.
me: AWW HIS NAME IS NO-hey thats not your name!
friend (karan, sita's brother): its JU WON
sukhan: JU ON!?
me: no its JU WON <3
ju won: *runs away*

later

sukhan talking to all the boys
sukhan: GUYS LOOK BALKIS IS STALKING THAT LITTLE BOY!
me: AY NO IM NOT LAH!
hi ju won :3
ju won ignores me T_T
me: WOAH I LOVE BEN 10! YOUR DRAWING IT?!
ju won sees his sister and runs to her.
*speaks in korean yadayaday*
juwon's sister: he's showing off cos you like him!
* ju won runs away * T_T

JU WON SO CUTEEE!!!! HEHE TOMORROW HEHEHEE
ohmy god i sound like a pedophile.
what the fuck i'm not.
KIDS are cute ok...
I WAS ONE & OLD PEOPLE FREAKED ME OUT TOO!
but Ju Won SHO CUTE!

wait

*he* is cuter
hahahaah
WAHHAHAa

OHMYGOD BALKIS SHUT UP YOU PEDOPHILE
HEY I'M NOT A PEDOPHILE!
OH RIGHT YEAH.

hahahaha
what the fuck hahaah
:)

hahaha

2008-07-16T05:51:00.000-07:00

okay soooo.
i didn't write anything about what happened today.
'kay Suk Han said that she wants to run away, get a cab to Genting to watch Super Junior
so i said
"if you are there all alone a pimp will kidnap you and make you join his gigolo!!"
and she said
"BALKIS. gigolo is for GUYS"
and joshua and izzy heard me say gigolo out loud ( i think )
so they prolly thought it was something...dirty
so i was talking to izzy and joshua
and izzy was talking about seeing 5 of *him* on stage.
joshua say 5 times the lazy
i wouldnt mind :D
i mean.
ahem
ughh
and joshua says that if i marry *him*; i have to do everything in the house especially wipe his ass.
oh gosh i wouldn't care! LOL i'm joking
hahahaha
well
i asked them if i was "boyish" and they were snickering
so i said "HEY IMA GIRL!" and izzy was laughing :(
soo
i was meant to be 'girly'
and that also means flirty
which i suck. ALOT
i mean like really. my first try was "hi" and i did a POKE!
then next was "hiiiiiiiiiiiiii"
but like i can't help but laugh
worst part is. i showed joshua if i was good at it. he said I CANT FLIRT FOR NUTS.
and *he* was kinda nearby so uh bad impression"? maybe.

you're the only one that makes my day.
when i'm down, i see you and your smile, my frown turns upside down
and then i'd end up smiling the whole day
i don't smile for anyone but you
even when you're not smiling i'd still be happy
but if you're down
i'll be down too<3

ten and a half months. woo. aha. just one eye contact today<3 & sophie's sister thinks he's hot. whoohaha. yes it was love at first sight when i saw you. HAHAHA. i know i'm tryna be cheesy right now.
but what can i do? i love him more than i love me.
is that good?

"if you were to live till a 100, i'd live till a 100 minus one, because i can't live a day without you"

i love you more than i love me.
and that might be a good thing
not really
oh well.
kay bye.
xxxx

:|

2008-07-16T04:00:00.000-07:00

many things have happened in the past week + last week.
where do i start?

welllll.
i'm gonna write it up here. for you two to read it.
this isn't about bitching.
its usually my ways of saying sorry.

yellow.
i really am sorry. when we started to hang out these 15 days; i really really regreted everything i did and said. i really enjoyed all our moments. now i feel terrible about what i said. but for you to know, it wasn't just me saying things. so i'm just wondering. why is it just me? isnt you usually the whole group? okay thats out of the point. i always remembered that sometimes when i'm angry and down you'd always brighten my day with you usual clumsy and funny self.
to you i changed. i bitch about people. i always do, (not sayin i'm bitchy or anything) but maybe because its you for the first time, that you think i changed because i never spoke about you.
i really wanna steal a time machine and go back in time to stop the old me from doing a BIG mistake. if i made you emo, i'd go kill myself (ah joking.)
but if i made you cry;
i really am a monster.
sita nick jonas, i am soo fucking sorry.
just so you know.
i do have attitude and i'll always be vulgar. (i'm not meaning that to you but thats just who i am.)
sorry.
sorry.
sorry.
MR SMITHERS?

Green.
yes. my mom bought the cupcakes. i want to steal the time machine and stop her from buying that ribbon. i'm really sorry if i made you fucking pissed at me. okay. i'm not 'scene'. well i like fit hair, but that doesn't mean i'm scene or whatever. its just stereotype. okay i'm going out of the point. okay well i confess. i'm really really bad at apologizing. i know this is gonna sound weird or something, but i really miss those times before 'LABELS' came. when emo and scene wasn't there how were we? i'm not saying that i hate you scene. i love you in anyway you are. if i seemed like i copied you in any way, i changed it all. i hope that helps a bit. when i think about our old times, i remember that when i'm sad, you'd always be there to help me out. i don't know what other way i can say sorry.
the cupcakes was always yours. i never wanted to 'steal' it.
this is the real me. i have 2 different pesonalities and they both make up ME.
SORRY.
fifteen minute guitar solo? roflmao?

i have been a mother fucking bitch, an asshole and an uberr jerk to you guys.
and i regret; alot.

you don't have to accept this apology. it is a lame way to apologize, but thats how i do.

another story?
hmmm.
Julys are bad weeks, especially a few weeks before Summer.
i wanna see his face everydayyyyyy<3
24/7
365
my whole life?

by the way. that picture of Acee, it wasn't him. he was self concious so he took a guy from myspace named 'Ross' as him. So that hot emo kid is Ross.
Acee is actually blonde
but he's still, and forever will be AWESOME.

love,
x

kl living

2008-07-15T04:32:00.000-07:00

YES :D
my exammies are overrr
yay
ohmygod ugh
i hate my uncle >:(
he's a retard.
and he's staying at my fcking house
FOR A FUCKING YEAR
AGH
and who the hell does he think he is?!
GRRR.
some time ago.
he punched my cousin and dragged him on the floor.
and he's been staying in my uncle's and auntie's house
for like longer than i lived.
ugh
i hate him.
and now all my summer plans are over.
the end.

finger on the trigger to my dear Juliet<3

2008-07-14T02:52:00.000-07:00

so i was looking at groups and i went pass the group where i met Acee.
(yes i miss my dear friend very much)
gosh i'm filling up my blog every second. sheesh wow.
kay here it is.

Racheal Roffle wrote at 10:30pm on February 7th, 2008
hmm the guy in the group picture is hot lols :P

Acee Charmaine-D'amour (London) wrote at 3:53am on February 8th, 2008
:O me hot?thanks :Pi really dont think i am .its an older picture anyways :Pmy gauges are bigger :P like. 28 mm

Racheal Roffle wroteat 10:20am on February 8th, 2008
wait - - - so mr group picture guy is really a guy ? :O

Acee Charmaine-D'amour (London) wrote at 4:53am on February 9th, 2008
Racheal Balkis (elc International School) wroteat 10:20pm yesterdaywait - - - so mr group picture guy is really a guy ? :OYes, i am really a guy aha

ahhh :(
everyone misses him
but it says in a message from his friend (i think its Kelsey, i don't know)
she says that one of his pictures isn't him or something. i don't understand much but its really him i miss, not his hotness well i just miss him.

mmmmm.
i had Science and Maths today and i'm sooo gonna fail.
My two weakest subjects in one day.
WOW.
the world is being cruel to me.
well
i have nothing else to write.
he was so cu----
okay stop i'm too much.
not really actually :P
kay bye.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

2008-07-13T03:01:00.000-07:00

...sorry.
okay so i shall tell you this hilarious story.
well its hilarious to me soooo whatever.

my adorable little fat chubby brother was lookin in my mom's bag and found like 500 bucks.
so he said "im gonna steal this :)"
my mom ignored, cos obviously he wouldnt.
so my older brother and i decided to take it away from him.
and shittt sonn!! he's been crying for hours! :O
i took a video of it HAHAHA and i said "this is the latest porn!!!"
hahahahahahahahahahah
sorry.
he's adorable

weekends are hard days to study. you know why?
kay so i have a dad he's really sick and he's got diabetes so he always ask for like a massage.
he's old so yeah.
WHEN I STUDIED LIKE TILL HALF THE BOOK MY DAD WAS CALLING ME.
so i was like "yeah dad??"
and he said "can i have a massage? :D"
=.=" I WAS STUDYING.
oh well i got distracted like 34823984723894723894274812 million times today when i was studying science.
i'm gonna fail fer sure.
sooooooooo.
26/9/2007 :]
the first day i liked him.
i don't count the days, i remember them.
well its not my fault i'm good at remembering! :P
chestnutchestnutchestnut brown in summersummersummer
urgh, i really can't stand my face.
i'm so uglyyyyyy AHHH
and no i'm not being attention whore its just natural :P
OMG i still remember haha
kay so it was the end of school (think it was around term 2, yeah)
i screamed out:
"WOOO! i'm straightedged!"
and well he came out of his class (our class is next to each other)
and he heard it sooo OH DEARR.
wonder if he knows what straightedged means
haaaaa, oh well.
ohmygod HAHA whoever you are go to my facebook profile and like on my wall HAHAHA
i was talking to hte yamla chetare lzu (for you to find out hahahah)
i can't wait for Halloween. its like my favourite dayy.
sooo.
sooo can you imagine.
in year 7 i had no piercings.
in year 8 i have 5. well i should be having SEVEN T_T
kay like
uhhhhh
i can't find my nail polish remover.
and i painted all my nails black.
well i'll find a way to escape the teachers tomoroww.
what the fuck high school musical music video is on
OW MY EAR DRUMS!!!
my stirrup, hammer and something is gonna break!!

OWWW

ashley is FOREVER YOUNG

i'm FOREVERTHESICKESTKID.

wait i'm gonna get a cake...be.right back
back
kay on valentines day i got him a chocolate from 7/11...cheap :(
on his birthday it was stuff toy and chocolate from 7/11...cheapcheap :(
sigh
kay bye

i'm taking back sunday

2008-07-12T20:08:00.000-07:00

lol a game.
Dear You, You have a cute ass.You make me wanna lala.You should try out modelling or sports teams. Someday I will kidnap you. You + me = i wont say :P. If I saw you now I'd melt.I would build a sandcastle just for you.I would get your name tattooed on my wrists. If I could sing you any song it would be for you to find out.We could sit under the stars. Love, Balkis .(P.S: I <3 you)

ohh and Acee's note :)
ahah see someone this least important would do this!
hmm what am i saying?

okay heres the rules, don’t read questions ahead. answer ALL questions truthfully dont write answers like "i don’t know" or "maybe". at the end of the survey it will tell you what to do next.

1.what would you say if someone punched a chicken?- I'd say thats pretty sick..

2.do u agree with people blowing up cows to produce less carbon dioxide?-lmao sure. 'cause you know, who WOULDN'T want chunks of beef falling from the sky?

3.would u ever lick a bowling ball?- Sure thing lmao, I'd lick anything

3.what's your favorite word that starts with the letter Q?- quirky .. i'm surprised thats a word. lmao

4.name a song that mentions whip cream in it:- sensual seduction :D

5.whos your favorite ex?- Theres a few :P

6.would u go up to your boyfriends/girlfriends mom and be like "HI MOM"?- sure. aha why not

7.do you like cross words?- NO! words confuse me enough, why cross them?

8.do you think one of your friends is ugly but u call them pretty?- I'm only friends with hot people... LMFAO NO WOW .. uhm yea , Joshh is to much of a pansy, and if i told him he was
ugly, he'd shank me :D

9.if you were abducted by aliens, what do you think they're favorite fruit would be?- EW aliens DON'T like fruit, they like... THEY LIKE mint chocolate..

230.if you could blow bubbles out of any part of ur body what part would it be?- LMAO NOT SAYING

113.if u were a striper what color would the glitter on ur chest be?- totally would havta be pink.

12.1how do you spell your name backwards with out vowels or "p" 's?- my FULL name,l ast to first is.. : RMD-NMRHC Cwow. have fun pronouncing that..

63.JUST DISCOVERED THAT YOU'RE ACTUALLY ELVIS IN DISGUISE and are in DESPERATE need of a new wardrobe do to this discovery. what colour underwear will you buy?- I'M ELVIS, I DON'T NEED ANY UNDERWEAR XD

4.what spice girls song are you?stop ? lmao who knows.

18.?tell me what you want what you really really want so tell me what u want what u rlly want !- thats... thatts nice :]

16.if you could go any where in the world with out leaving your bedroom.. what would u wear?- i'd suddenly become a nudist :]

1. when you walk out side and look up what do you see beside you?- nothing, i'm looking up. JEEZ.

12.if u were a 40 yr old man trying to look for lil kids what would your msn address be?- i wouldn't need msn, i'd be out there doing it :D

19.if you were a lesbian would you wear tube socks?- no, tube socks are just.. ew lmao

20. how many kids would u have if u were a lepricon?- 69 :]

45. if you were a band freak would u play the tuba with both hands?- lmao! UHMMMM YEES

22.okay so ur ordering the pizza how many times do u ask if the pizza guy is cute?- every other word. lmao and they answer" NO he's as greasy as the pizza "

28.so you are on the show A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila would you make out with the guys who are competing with you?- sure thing, lmao

27.if you were Gwen Stefani would u want to replace your harajuku girls with sumo wrestlers, if so what would their names be?- YES! they'd all be named after the sound they make when they walk

21.when you played with Barbie’s would you take their clothes off?- YES! how else would they get dressed..

26. how many boobs would a person with a uniboob have?- uniboob.. lmao sounds like their breasticle went to university :P

37. does this survey amuse you? if so go into detail.- Heck yes it does because it amazes me with the amazingness.

28. if you could have sex with any one in the world, what would you eat after?- uhm. lmao nothing ?

39. so this guy comes up to you and asks "how many nipples do you have"...do u think about the answer?- aha i'd lift up my shirt and tell him to count for himself..

33. you live in a shack with 3 kids and ur a prostitute. what game is this?- life?

21. if you had an electric guitar would you play with an ape?- no, i'd rather play with a pig, so it
could squeal

12.so your kissing your best friend do you enjoy this?- sure lol why not.

43.how many times have you thought about wanting to be a dog?- NEVER id hate it aha, i'd drool to much, and everyone could see my nakedness lmao

34.so your walking down the street and you find a dime what’s the year on it?- who cares, it's a flipping dime :]

85.you go and visit your neighbor and they ask you "do you have a turtle?" and you tell them "hells yea i have slow sexy time with him all the time!" how does your neighbor react?- my neighbour would probably bring out his snail and we have a slow sexy time competition

22 . what happens when you mix fire and a watermelon?- anything.. could even end up at willy wonka's chocolate factory.

38. How do they get jelly inside the jelly doughnuts?- when you take your first bite, they freeze time, and insert jelly :P

39. why didn't God make it so that flowers could talk?- 'cause he forgot, so he invented drugs that did that for him.

18. do you drink or eat a slurpie?- i do it ALL

37. how many donkeys does it take to screw in a light bulb?- one.. the one from shrek :D
if you thought about any of these questions seriously.. u need to see a shrink.Tehe !

IF YOU CARE ABOUT ME, YOU'LL READ THIS
There are two basic types of lung cancer: non small cell and small cell.I happen to have small cell lung cancerSmall cell lung cancer is most commonly found in smokers. The biggest problem with small cell lung cancer is the speed at which is spreads, which is quite rapidly, making it a very formidable disease. Small cell lung cancer is a bit more common in men than women. The positive side of small cell lung cancer is that many patients have a positive response to chemotherapy. It can produce large tumors, and has the ability to spread to the brain, lymph nodes, liver and other parts of the body. There are two basic stages of small cell lung cancer. One stage is called limited stage, which means the cancer is generally limited to the confines of the chest. Extended is the other stage, and this means that the cancer has then spread to other organs and parts of the body. If caught in a timely fashion, most small cell lung cancer can be treated before it gets to the extended or spreading stage. There are many risk factors for getting small cell lung cancer, and the most common are smoking, prolonged exposure to secondhand smoke, and exposure to things such as radon or asbestos. Mine happens to be caused by smoking
There are many symptoms involved with small cell lung cancer. These are pretty much common with all forms of the disease. Symptoms include shortness of breath, wheezing, unusual tiredness or fatigue, coughing up blood, chest pain, swollen face or neck, loss of appetite, and others. I pretty much have all of those..
When detected early, the survival rate can be as high as 25%. In the disease has advanced, survival rates average around 5% or less.

This type of cancer is very deadly. Only about 6% of people with this type of cancer are still alive after 5 years.
EVERYONE WHO SMOKES, DO ME THE FAVOUR AND STOP.. I DONT WANT YOU TO FEEL HOW I FEEL.. IT FUCKING SUCKS MORE THEN A WHORE.. JUST.. PLEASE DON'T SMOKE.. I HAVE BEEN DOING SO SINCE I WAS 8 AND REGRET IT HORRIBLY

OHMYGOD OUR RANDOM CONVO :P

me: omg so the hot group pic guy really is a guy?!
acee: yes i am a guy :P
me: no i meant like your not a model model guy like your an average guy like a HUMAN guy
acee: ohh so you thought i was a model.
me: yeah shouldnt you be overjoyed someone thinks your a pro model?
acee: hmm nuno should i?
me: i would if i were you :P
acee: then i guess i'm overjoyed :D how are you?
me: fine..just came back from schooland did some school's marching thingy for hoursmy leggies are exhausted
acee: awhh..sounds..fun lmao
me: FUN?! FUN?! FUN?! i have forgotten the definition of fun now...ohh your birthday is on valentine's day thats so cool
acee: hmm i guess so :P

another one
me: ROFL your a nudist :P
acee: lmao TOTALY! like they say..If you've got it, flaunt it. MEANING i'm obviously a rebel Cause i don't got it, but i flaunt it >;D

yepp if you don't got it FLAUNT IT JUST LIKE HIM! :)

sooo.
i just had a dream about him three times in a row.
thats freaky. i don't really know what it means or what happens.
but like the other time...i had a dream he was wearing a green shirt and cargo pants.
the next day (i think he was practicing for History)
he was wearing it.
i mean like, isn't that just plain freaky?!!?
that dream was the dream where he liked me (which i don't think will happen but oh i wish it would)
it was like a hug or something..and it felt really real...
oh gosh i'm so self obsessed.
wait thats out of the subject.
well i wish it happened.
:P
nothing else
bye

HAHAHAH

2008-07-12T09:12:00.000-07:00

okay the previous post
HAHAHAAH
You by The Afters
ITS A CHRISTIAN SONG I JUST FOUND OUT HAHAHAAHAH
its about Jesus Christ and stuff
but it is still sweet
thats why when i listen to it i was thinking
"THIS DUDE WORSHIPS HIS GIRLFRIEND!"
hahahahahahahaha this is funny
so i went out today. (procrastinating)
i got piercing number 5 :)
and i bought diy hairdye.
i'm dying my hair chestnut brown this holiday.
think it'll look good on me? i don't know.
ahhh soo so far i have 5 piercings (i should be having 7 but it closed :[ )
i feel like moving schools when i finish year 9. :/
x

saturdays

2008-07-11T21:50:00.000-07:00

are boring. i procrastinate TOO much. like seriously.
lets procrastinate :D
nah i'm joking, i'll study after this post
now i have science, maths, history, ugama & music.
music is always our last exam and its prettttyyyy easy.
i want summer...yet i don't want it...i'd be living 2-3 months without your face :(
awwww
i'm listening to those indie bands that got famous.
i'm getting too vulnerable these days. why oh why..
i love the song You by The Afters <3
its so fucking sweet..... ♥_♥
i cry when i listen to it <3
i mean imagine if someone that sweet singing it to you!
sweetest song ♥
even the guy sounds so sweet (hope he's hot)
ahh the other song is so rockkk
BUT I love The Afters

You - The Afters
My heart is as frail as a dove
And my spirit is as weak as a rose
See my sorrow, feel my pain
You're my refuge,
You're my reason,
My strength in this beautiful place
That's where I find God
[Chorus:]
You're in my heart, You're in my soul
You are my heaven, You're my home
You're my best friend, You're my true love
You are my treasure, You're my God

I watch as the mountains fall down
And the rivers part at your feet
Your creation sings
Your praise Even winds obey and angels bow down
At Your beautiful voice
That's where I find God

[Repeat Chorus]
You're in my heart, You're in my soul
You are my heaven, You're my home
You're my best friend, You're my true love
You are my treasure, You're my hope
You are my peace, You are my joy
You are my Savior, You're my God

how does the singer change from The Way You Are to You?
its like Chris Daughtry to....like Teddy Geiger or something..
he is my treasure.
sooooo who's reading my blog right now like now like 12:59?
ehhh i need new new new comments.
:(
pwease. whoever you are? :]
ehhhhhhhhh.
i'll hold you in my arms...

OHHH SOMETHING NEW HAPPENED YESTERDAY :D
hahahahaha Malay Exam hilarious.
rudy imitating the *** haha (censor his name)
i kept laughing in silence in class. i couldn't help it. i would've burst out laughing.
i usually like snort like a pig or something but i didnt suprisingly :O
Mr Menke nearly caught me.
Joshua, he sat in front of me, he couldn't help but laugh to my laugh.
Suk han was laughing at Rudy.
Izzy hehe Izzy :D
I can't help it my laugh can be reallllyyy contageous.
oh yeah you know what. when i was telling my friend about Acee's death. it happened like this.

me: guess what my friend died :)
me: OH MYGOD I MEAN *:(

sorry Acee if that brings you down... we all miss you in Earth here. wonder how Jackie is right now.. wait i forgot her name
The Fine Young Cannibals wooo.
Everyone likes All Time Low.
hahahaah Ashley I showed you We The Kings & All Time Low!! >:)
ahhhhhhhh someone teach me to like Mainstream musiccc.
helppp.
i'm downloading Ashlee Simpson ? :D
ahhh soooo WHATS UP PEOPLE? :D
oh gosh i suck like.....SHIT SHIT. not the one that comes outta the anus but like.
I DONT KNOW.
we're hardcore! ^0^
hahahahahahhhah
remember the
How to get over a guy in your weekend
?
yeahh i am currently really loving The Medic Droid
but if i go OVER the line I might love TMD more then KJH!
:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:O:
ohhh dear.
but like TMD is fucking awesome whattodo oh whattodo?
sighhhh :/
oh well it can be equal (well not really)
KJH? <3
AHHAHAHAH KER JEN HO
sorry.
WOOO JEN HO!
he's awesome my cool genius scrabbler frind who has the new dictionary.
like the new words like ZYZZYVA and stuff.
its cool!
:D
well i gotta go lunch is served.
i'm gaining weight.
:X
bye

For The Medic Droid<3

2008-07-11T00:27:00.001-07:00

its been one and a half years since I found The Medic Droid. I LOVE EM<3 sooooo I shall.....PUT UP ALL THEIR LYRICS! :D

The Killer Anna - The Medic Droid
She walks in, as i'm walking out
Should I try this once again, should I try this once again?
And as we kiss, I remember how it felt
To fall in love when I was young
But I cant get that feeling back.
She tried to killers coming?
Maybe i'm just to jaded now.
I tried to killers waiting.
But dont say you dont care,
I know you do.
I know you do.
[But, I won't leave i'll try and pretend]
And I won't leave ill try and pretend.
'Cause we've got nothing to loose, But us so here we go again.
I know you found preaching,
But i wont stop from thinking,
That when this ends we'll be the worst of enemies.
[I know]
And as she leaves,
I remember times we've said,
"Can we try this once again? 'Cause baby, you're just what i need!"
And as the night grows cold,
Well hold me close dont let me go.
We got it all wrong, But baby, we'll figure it out.
As you say you care,
I know you do.
[But, I won't leave ill try and pretend]
And i wont leave ill try and pretend.
'Cause we've got nothing to loose,
But us so here we go again.
Dry your eyes. [Dry your eyes]
Stay calm. [Stay calm]
I feel so alone, And i do know.
[I know that i was wrong]
And we'll try again.
[I know that i was wrong]
The winner is.
Is.
But we never made it.
I could back down and cut it out,
But i cant take another second without you here.
We tried time and another pass and time.
Maybe im the one to blame?
Girl just know i love you too
And now were done,
But here we go again.
know that i was wrong.
know that i was wrong.
I know that i was wrong.
I know that i was wrong.
I know that i was wrong....

Keeping Up With The Joneses - The Medic Droid
The lights are out and the dancefloor's waiting
but you're too busy blending in the crowd
The lights are out and the dancefloor's waiting
but you're too busy following the crowd
And when you come back down..now..girl
When you come back down..now..girl
When you were a young girl, did you wanna be something more baby?
But now you feel you're so lost
And you're burning up inside, yeah
We’re clocking in to watch our fate come crashing down
We’re clocking in to watch our fate come crashing down
I can't pretend I’m happy when...
And now I know it's pointless
I’m constantly on a down
And I’m tired of waiting, waiting
Climb to the top, climb to the top
And now you're falling again
The lights are out and the dance floor's waiting
But you're too busy blending in the crowd
The lights are out and the dance floor's waiting
But you're too busy following the crowd
And when you come back down now, girl...
When you come back down now, girl...
When I was a young boy I wanted to be something more, baby
But I can't dance, no, and I sure as fuck cant sing
We’re clocking in to watch our fate come crashing down
We’re clocking in to watch our fate come crashing down
Why do we play into this motive?
What are you waiting for tonight?
You wonder, you wait
And you cant get through this without a friend
Now
Climb to the top, climb to the top
And now you're falling again
Lets break it down Everything’s so jaded,
trying hard to keep up with the Joneses
And his wife’s so dirty, baby
Sexing up every Tom, Dick and Harry in town
Lets go
I can't pretend I’m happy when...And now I know it's pointless
I’m constantly on a down And I’m tired of waiting
Climb to the top, climb to the top climb to the top, climb to the top
And now i know its pointless

Fer Sure - The Medic Droid
fan: hey boo, how are you? oh my god, I miss you so much! how'd you been? we should hang out sometime. myspace me fer sure.
boy: What the fuck! you could totally see his fucking tracks! Oh my god.
Girl: I know what the fuck! I mean he draws his eyebrows on with a fucking sharpie.
Boy: I know fucking asses is that. This is Chris fucking Donathon and don't get mad jeffrey star cuz I made you snort a lot of my cum while I fuck you in the ass
Fersure maybe fersure not fersure eh fersure bomb
Pulled up at the stoplight
Did drugs on the dashboard,
look at the mess we made tonight
Kick off you stilletoes, kick off your stilletoes
and fuck me in the backseat fuck me in the backseat
You're always falling in disguise
and always quick to compromise
Kick off your stilletoes, kick off your stilletoes
and fuck me in the backseat fuck me in the backseat
fersure maybe fersure not fersure eh fersure bomb
this is the end of what we planned (of what we planned) and now
we're not falling in love, we're not falling apart
(girl, lets dance the night away)
this is how the beat drops, this is how the beat drops, just let your body go
This is how the beat drops This is how the beat drops [I wanna see your panties drop girl now] All this time is wasted pretending we're in love But that's alright cause you know I love being with you and seeing you cry
so don't let go-o-o
don't let go-o-o
don't let go
fersure maybe fersure not fersure eh, fersure bomb. Pulled up at the stoplight, did drugs on the dashboard, look at the mess we made tonight, kick off your stilletoes, kick off your stilletoes and fuck me in the backseat, fuck me in the backseat. You're always falling in disguise, and always quick to compromise
kick off your stilletoes, kick off your stilletoes and fuck me in the backseat, fuck me in the backseat. Fer sure maybe fer sure not fersure eh fer sure bomb
This is the end of what we planned, (of what we planned) and now
We're not falling in love, we're just falling apart, (so girl lets dance the night away)
this is how the beat drops, this is how the beat drops, just let your body go
this is how the beat drops this is how the beat drops (i wanna see your panties drop girl now)
all this time is wasted, and we're pretending we're in love. But that's alright cos you know i love being with you and seeing you cry
So don't let go-o-o
Well don't let go-o-o
Don't let go-o-o
No jkjkjk lololol; i heart your fucking makeup OHMYGOD i love your hair, is that a new tatoo did that piercing fucking hurt? No jkjkjk lololol.
We're not falling in love We're just falling apart [so girl let's dance the night away]
This is how the beat goes This is how the beat goes [Just let your body go]
This is how the beat drops This is how the beat drops [I wanna see your panties drop girl now] All this time is wasted pretending we're in love but that's alright cause you know I love being with you and seeing you cry
So don't let go-o-o [All this time is wasted]
Well don't let go, no-o [Pretending we're in love]
But that's alright cause you know I love being with you and seeing you cry But that's alright
Girl: you got fucking giz all over my back. where'd you put my panties?
Boy: i threw them out the window bitch. shut the fuck up.

WOO THATS IT :)

OH YEAH

2008-07-10T23:30:00.000-07:00

haha you know whatttttt.
i just remembered how i always say something very....'horny' and probably the person hears.
i shall tell the story..

me: hey luxmee, you know i have this friend Dustin. he edits his pictures and one of them says, "Dustin Palmer, the cause of female masturbation" AHAHAHAHAHAH.
luxmee's eyes moving to Mr Kanaparan who was right next to the table went we were saying that.
HAHAAHAHAHAHa
sorry.

ohh that reminds me..ZAKRI!!!

zakri: DAYUMMM HOW HE GET A GIRL LIKE THAT?
hahaha burst in to laughter.
zakri: i shall go and stalk them
comes back
zakri: and now she has mah babies. ;)
mr patterson comes by and stares at Zakri

AHAHAHAHAHA THAT WAS GOLDEN HAHAHAAH

oh there was this really funny one... and i got a bad impression of myself to him.

Arinah: hey balkis, is this really a dick? (its a pic of a tree) munshen says it does.
Me: THATS A DICK!?!
finds out that HE was right behind me, he walks away with this 'oh em gee that girl who likes me is too horny for my brains'
well okay the face part i made it up :P

HOHOHOHOH REAL ONE!!

Rudy: i shall say her name in ARABIC!
Me & Adhya: uhh Rudy wait Ms She--
Rudy: MUSA! 8D

Ms Sheila: S:O ? WHAT THE

Me: OHMYGOD YOU KNOW HER NEW BOYFRIEND HE IS SOOOO UG---
bus passes by and it is fucking loud

Sophie & Luxmee end up bursting in laughter. :(

i always say things at the wrong time =_= you can ask Suk Han... :P
uhhhh

TBC?

and so

2008-07-10T23:00:00.000-07:00

sooooo i uploaded a few new pictures on Flickr, go check it out.
www.flickr.com/applethecarrotdestroyer
i'm still a bit effected by Acee's death.. its just hard to think about it..I mean I spoke to him! He recommended me to listen to The Fine Young Cannibals.
I LOVE THAT BAND AND NOW THE GUY I CREDIT TO IS DEAD. :(
even my friend thought he was hot.
:(
if you see our conversations, it was all pretty funny.
i'm listened to Hold The Door by Armor For Sleep.. its really nice but it makes me feel a bit depressed.
EHHH why do i have to rant about my depression EVERYDAY?!?!
you guys will get all bored eventually.
SOOOO WHO'S READING MY BLOG RIGHT NOW?
go go go comment in the box!! >>>>>
i will be h-a-p-p-y :]
so today i had my malay exam, and I SWEAR. we had a ten minutes break and Mr Lim didn't let us go toilet. So i told him that if i dont go toilet i cannot concentrate in the exam at all...so he let us go :)
and i ate Ramen, and it was gooooooooooooooooooooood.
so Sukhan's little neighbour was like chasing after Ozier. and her teacher told her to sit down cos she was like a 'clown'. and the teacher said if she got of the chair she will have to sit in class.
GOSH the infant annex teachers are STRICT
monia continued on teasing me. again =.=
well oh well she can't help it its soooo Monia...
i have a conscience.
okay to be continued... :)

today

2008-07-10T03:06:00.000-07:00

..was an okay day. i had english and geography and i fell asleep in Geography @_@

i wish i was pretty. i'm not pretty, smart, athletic or any of that. i'm annoying. i'm weird. i'm stupid. i'm ugly. i'm fat. i mean, if you try to find one good thing about me, there's gonna be nothing right? i'm don't wanna sound like an attention whore but this is really what i think of myself. i have low self esteem BUT i have ADD. :/ i just don't know right now.

i hate my hair i wanna dye it in summerr. ahhhhh.

today monia was REALLY trying to tempt me into very bad things VERY BAD. HOW EVIL she was telling me uber horny stories and tempt me to stare at someone's ass! i mean come on, i'm trying to give him some room. am i giving alot?

okay my friend just told me the most shocking news of my life.

kay wait it wasnt true.

oh yeah sooo

i'm very sadd.

my friend died. :(

okay see, i have this friend in England. well a 'penpal'. He's half french.

This isn't love or anything. We weren't that close but he was fun to talk to.

Sad thing is, he passed away yesterday. He has SCLC.

i can't believe he died....he was damn awesome..well this was our last conversation

AWW NO HE DELETED HIS ACCOUNT BEFORE HE DIED :(

well i hope there is some in the wall-to-wall. I'm looking for it..and i don't know what page..

I STILL REMEMBER..

he was joking about that he could be a nudist and that the march past i did sounded 'fun' to him

AHHH DAMN FACEBOOK HE'S NOT IN MY WALL-TO-WALL :(

I KNOW! i shall put his picture up!

RIP ACEE you might be up there watching me add your picture in my blog this shows that we all miss you even the not-closest friend.

R.I.P my very awesome friend Acee Charmain-D'amour

is that how you spell please come from the dead and tell meeeeeeeeeeeeee.

WAHHH

i'll write more..

LATER

hokey pokey :]

2008-07-09T03:02:00.001-07:00

yuppp today is the first day of my exam. art first.
CAN YOU BELIEVE IT BITCH
I HAD TO HOLD MY PEE FOR A FUCKING HOUR!!!
i was gonna dieeeeeeee.
we had Mr Lim first. he gives this vibe that freaks me out.
THIS ISNT FAIR. I asked the teacher (not Mr Lim) if i could pee, and he told me to hold my pee.
In the ICT Exam, a girl asked him if she could pee and he allowed her!
CRUEL OH, CRUEL WORLD.
HAAHHAAHHA. sorry i was laughing about something else.
there are plenty of things that i want to put here...but i shouldnt.
i have an English exam and then Geography. I'm so happy that I'm not that bad at Geography. Its just that the teacher's questions are sooo tricky. There were fucking 21 pages in the ICT exam. When I finish my exam I swear I'm gonna party so hard I think I'd probably OD on non-drug relating things.

ehhh what am i saying.

put your right foot in put your right food out put your right food in and you shake it all about you do the hokey pokey and you turn around thats what we're talking about clapclap.

^_^
there are soo many things i want to talk about but i don't know where to start.
well he's back and i'm sorta happy it feels like a million years :/
i'm obsessed with baking things right now. i wanna make a cheese cake :]
i wonder how many people read my blog. Whoever you are, SHOW YOURSELF!
hehe :]
no seriously i dont want someone i dont know reading this...EVERYDAY.....AND I DONT KNOW THEM....AHHHHHHH STALKER
nooo im joking this is an easy stage before i become teh famous blog writer.
AS IF GEEEZ.
i'm becoming weirder these days.
i want to act normal and neutral but its so hard.
maybe my NORMAL stage is HYPER to people.

i smile too much.

i'm planning to get piercing number 5 and 6 soooooon.
theyre really addicting.
AH SNAKEBITES & TONGUE PIERCINGS
ohhhh belly
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
UH WHAT?

omg what the eff was i talking about
its probably because i havent posted anything for sometime.
I THINK....
WAKAKAKAKA :3
must
lose
weight

i
dont
know
why
but
EEEH.

I LIKE CHUCK AND CSI NY. Did you watch it last night? it was AWESOME. LOVEEEE.
i know i have all the time to watch ONE tv show a day. gimme a break its CSI I cant like NOT watch it you know!
hehe Eddie Cahill HOT. Edward cullen HOT. Chace Crawford HOT. Chuck HOT.
OHHHh AND HIM HOT.
>.<
i'm so weird.
i'm sorry but i am. D:

i just noticed. House is on and I'm right next to ze TV.
OMGSH ehhh Emo Kid on the loose! but WHO is ze emokid? O:

oh YEAH I JUST REMEMBERED!
haha Chris you probably didnt know this.
i made a skit about you!
i cant really write it all down so I'll summarise
its about a young innocent boy name Chris Chalmers who is under peer pressure because all his friends are doing drugs and smoking marijuana. Chris is lost and he doesn't know if he should take drugs or not.

OHMYGOD I SAW THE NEXT EPISODE OF CSI ITS AWESOME :O
sorry that was random.
ahhh well maybe thats it.
MAYBE.

and so

2008-07-06T06:01:00.000-07:00

ahhh i went baking shopping :)
my mom's gonna bake some cheese cake tomorrow. yay yumm.
my dad's birthday is coming Saturday. I'm planning to bake a cake or cupcakes for him. He likes it when I cook for him so I hope this would be good :)
I changed my layout like, 3454 times. As in edit. I hope I can keep this and probably add some touches. I bought like, 3 magazines. I read all of them and they're boring. Lucky they're just liked less than 5 bucks each.

The Afters are sounding niiiice. 2 more days till my exam. Stress. Well bye, I better go start studying or if I see my results, I might get fed to the cannibals :/

:)

2008-07-05T23:32:00.000-07:00

kayy SOOOOO. i was baking brownies today. it tastes deliFUCKINGlicious :O
same with my chocolate chip cookies yesterday<3
cooking is starting to be a big hobby of mine. BUT i still study just to remind you guys that. i finished studying ICT and today is Geography and English. Geography is quite an easy subject for me, so I'm thinking to take it in Year 10. But I wonder, in Year 9 do we have to make those big ass Eiffel Tower models? :P I wanna make the drink! :D:D

my final exams are starting on Wednesday. Its very kind of the teachers to give Art Exam first. I love Art Exams hehehe :D but in O levels....its like 4-6 fucking hours of Art Exam. KILL ME. Then after Art is ICT. Then the next day is English & Geography. Then Friday its Malay. I get 20 minutes of break and 3 hours of Malay, ohhhh WOW. I don't really like this blog skin. Well its uber cute and colourful but I hate this small scrolling stuff around so I'm gonna change it to some plain looking one (if i may feel like it.) Well I love that big dinosaur there and the huge ice cream stick (L) and the chocolate. Now that I think about it, its like Katamari Damacy :D

KATAMARI DAMACY~~~~~ ^0^
ehhhh help me i can't choose between them... @_@

another one.

2008-07-04T20:51:00.000-07:00

kayy SO.
lets talk about bands :)
underground unknown ones.
bands i knew at:
year 6: Avenged Sevenfold, Paramore, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus (their famous now :( )
year 7: The Medic Droid, AFI, Boys Like Girls, Quietdrive, Taking Back Sunday, Augustana, Cute Is What We Aim For, Hawthorne Heights (well Sophie showed it), Incubus (their famous right?), Secondhand Serenade, The Subways
year 8: EVERYTHING :P

ehhhhe you know what i found this picture of me holding a sponge guitar!
IM BORN TO LOVE ROCK MUSIC :D
heehehehehehehe listening to SOULJA BOY :P
its old.

i got it going :D

2008-07-04T20:28:00.000-07:00

well i'm studying but not good enough @_@
i'm gonna fail my exams...and stay back.....and be with those....PEOPLE AHHH
well i better think positive and study later :
SIGH~ uhmmm :]
okay SO!
if the guy you like has been absent for a fuckin week what do you think happened?
a few possibilities.

he has chickenpox
he has AIDS?!!?!? :
he is trying out at like, 3 schools.
he is overseas because something happened to his family.
he is hiding from me.
he is in a breakdown so he skips school.
he is stressed because of exams

well i think its most probably number 4. i mean CHICKENPOX, man. he's healthy-ish rightt? sooo yeah. i'm just too paranoid because not seeing him for a week's kindof making me go crazy. well if i see him on Monday...i'm gonna go high. EEEEEHHHHH. he's probably overseas cos i haven't seen him online. its too awkward talkin to him on MSN someone help me in these stuff! i better check my gaia account if there are updated stuff.....i wanna get piercing number 5 :) and tomorrow my little brother has taekwondo at GIS so i can go buy more more things in ZE FLEE MARKETT. :)

OH METRO STATION ON TV!! I DIDNT KNOW THEY HAVE A VIDEO :O ohh now it Colbie Caillat. hehe like that name Colbie its cute :) ohhh if i get a daughter she will be either McKayla, Juno, Alexis or Colbie :) eeeee CUTE.

well thats it........... all my books are full of doodles of YOU<3>

love

READ THIS

2008-07-03T02:42:00.001-07:00

i'm serious this is soooo funny
anatomy of an emo poser.
(egyptian, no offence to de egyptians but this is funny.)
oh, by the way i'm not emo just so you know
you scene kids; non emo posers, and other people will laugh :P

HERE: ( i bold the funny part! )

The emo subculture is associated with emo music but also extends into appearance, behavior, and perspectives on life. If you want to get in touch with your inner emo, here's how. Actually, it's not something you can easily fake. There are many posers just like for punks. Also, you must be very sensitive, naturally. Emos always talk about how their life sucks so to be emo you have to be depressing.

some egyptian emo kid: life suxxxx.....soo board,,bye

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
sorry.
i don't mean to be heartless but this really is the poser type! :P

someone against emo: where is my iPod NANO im gonna be late for my DRAMA class if i cant find it SOOONUH. omg its raining outside. the earth TOTALLY understands me........TOTALLY. i think ill go draw it.omG where's my hot topic gift certifiCAAAAAAAAAATEEEEEi need to go to the bathroom to cut my HAAAAAAAAAAIRRRRRjust coz i'm BOOOOOOREDomg i'm so SAAAAD b/c i'm so EMOOOOOmy boyfriend is the only one that can make me HAPPYYYYYYhe's the only one who underSTANDS MEEEEEEEEEUHi need to go get another rose tatoo with some BLUEEEEEEEE ON IT

and another one: oh mai GAWWWWSHUH.......puh-lease pass me the dark brown hair dyyyyye coz its gonna look SOOOO VINTAAAAGE when i take my pictures for my MYSPAAAACE - oh my gosh black and white photOGRPAHAYYYYYYYYY its so DEEP and like...PENSIVEEEE. just like my BOYFRIENDDDDD. we share our sunglasses because we are SO fab. ill meet you in the cafe for some lowfat lattessssss omg harry POTTERRRRR ive read them ALL and the NARNIA books for suuuuuure. im so SAD this incense i am burning reminds me of my other boyfriend from like the 10th grade im going to CRYUHHHHH right after i paint my nails a saddening deep marroon lacquerrrrr. im gonna cut my hair into a girly choppy style where i can barely pull it back into a pony tail. hippy pearls are AWESOMMMMME i droop them down low across my BROKEN HEART so i can later STRANGLE myself while listening to THRICE and like SIMPLE PLAN and some ryan ADAMSSSSS ugh and maybe some old school COLTRANNNNE and like...INCUBUSSSSSSS too.

I'M SORRY EMO POSERS BUT HAHA.
i'm against emo poser not that much of emo doesn't mean i'm emo.

i'm ME :D

i'm just so

2008-07-03T01:50:00.000-07:00

FUCKING ANGRY.

its just that the nicest person in this world changed.
if you know who you are i don't care if you read this. Its meant for you anyway.
by the way to most of you this is a guy.
i have never gotten mad at a guy like this bad my whole life.
i do get a bit pissed but not this bad.
i mentioned something about this a few posts ago but i want to type this again.

i'm not the only one who thinks this. everyone does.
you changed. you're not the person that everyone enjoyed hanging out with.
i don't know..i just hate change. i don't mind if a dick changed to an awesome nice person.
but this is:
awesome nice guy-->DICK.
i know i'm such an asshole.
i called you MOFO.
that's cos you called everyone MOFO.
if you remember when it was, ASS.

you hated me first. so i'm just hating you back.

so if you're reading, here's a message from most of your friends, & me.
we miss the old you because the new you killed it. we hope the old you comes back. but with your attitude..

its never gonna happen.

bye 찬희, the old one that everyone onced loved (as a best friend OKAY)

i feel

2008-07-02T04:00:00.000-07:00

...depressed, sad, disappointed...a little bit alone.
i don't know..i mean i do look all happy its just that i don't like people coming up to me and saying, "whats wrong" "are you okay" "why are you so emo?"
i just hate getting that type of attention.
i mean sometimes can't people just let me sit down and be quiet..
it just gets annoying when you wanna sit down and think of stuff and people go up to you asking why you're so "emo"
i just hate that word these days. no one really knows the meaning of emo anymore.
i don't want to be emo, i'm NOT emo. i'm just me.
no matter how much i'm depressed..i will never put depression in front of my future.
i know people who did that and where they are now...i'm not gonna mention them (and no they're not my friends or in school)
and to me there's no need to take depression pills. i just cope with "depression"
well i don't know..i started getting all depressed since like Year 5 or Year 6.
maybe it started when my dad lost his job as a state assemblyman..he got depressed for a few months.
and then...well i don't wanna make my problems that public..unless i already did. i don't want to be the center of THAT attention.

i think it is true
when you're in love with someone and you don't know how they feel about you
you get very little confidence.
you easily get depressed.
you get all emotional.
you become more and more sensitive.
you get all vulnerable.
sometimes you might even get tantrums.

its probably how i'm feeling now..i dont know i think i'm just going crazy. sometimes when i'm depressed i feel like eating alot so i eat (maybe alot) but after that i get depressed for eating alot. :( i don't like my body and weight. i hate my height. i hate my face sometimes i want to even punch the freakin' mirror. i NEVER wear short shorts or skirts. i wear baggy clothes because tight ones make me look too fat.

i miss him so much. its 5 days and i'm going crazy. i keep thinking he'll come the next day and he didn't. i hope you come tomorrowwwwwwwww...i miss your face you you you JUST YOU.
i haven't like any other guy ever since i liked you. 9 months & 1 guy. wow. i know to some of you its not alot..but all these 9 months will come down to nothing.

i love youu 재훈
yupp i can write korean now :D
but i cant speak.
:(
yeah if he sees it, i dont mind you seeing that! :P

i miss you every day and everynight every dark every light (I KNOW I SUCK. :P)
i miss you ever second..even in class at home anywhere anytime.
i miss you more than the scenekid misses their cupcake or camera or coontail :(
i miss you more than an emokid misses their eyeliner skinnies and razorblades :(
i miss you more than a gangsta misses their bling their rap music and oversized clothes :(
i miss you more than a hippie misses peace. :(
i miss you more than a punk rock metal head misses their...metal head :(

I MISS YOU AND IT WAS JUST 5 FREAKIN DAYS.
imagine when you leave and how long i'd miss you in the summer holiday.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKK I THINK I REALLY REALLY REALLY LOVE YOU

yes i sound SO obsessive.
hehe obsessive compulsive disorder.

sooo..

dictionary time!

bu·li·mi·a
An eating disorder, common especially among young women of normal or nearly normal weight, that is characterized by episodic binge eating and followed by feelings of guilt, depression, and self-condemnation. It is often associated with measures taken to prevent weight gain, such as self-induced vomiting, the use of laxatives, dieting, or fasting. Also called bulimarexia, bulimia nervosa.

in-som-ni-a
inability to obtain sufficient sleep, esp. when chronic; difficulty in falling or staying asleep; sleeplessness.

SHITE i used to have that :O

uhh soooooo nothing else much there
except
i love youuuuuuuuuu :]
hahahaah im so obsessive :P
x

hehe :D

2008-07-01T03:42:00.000-07:00

ashley: omg sukhan your such a dumbo!
suk han: but i dont have wings!
me: sukhan dumbo flies with his ears!
dumbo rocks :D (my cox)

me: hey ashley look at my bling :D
ashley: (daydreamin lookin at somewhere else)
me: ASHLEY LOOK AT MY BLING!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah i might force you to look at ma BLING
hehe nigahiga :D

fo shizzle ma nizzle the tizzle....drzzle

OH RIGHT THIS IS A BLOG I SHOULD BE WRITING ABOUT MY TODAY THIS THAT!
^_^
so yehh. AWW NO MORE CSI NY D:
eddie cahill & chace crawford (L)
I MEAN
sooooo yeah i should be studying. :(
but i gotta update for the world sometime!
well not much people read this blog so who would give a fuck rightt?

so yeahhhh uhhh SPAIN WON YAY! GO FER____ i forgot SHITT

i named my ratata godzilla :D

ahh hes been absent for 2 days
: (
LOL IM SO WEIRD HE'D AGREE HEHE.

today

2008-06-29T01:15:00.000-07:00

yupp taking back sunday
guess what????
i saw Sofia today in Mont kiara market!
she just came back from Australia yesterday night..
and i'm first to see her! aint i awesome!?!?
i saw 4 hot guys!! they're korean by the way...
but yeah they're hot :D:D
but not interested. i see a hot guy i love him for 5 minutes then done.
IM not a PLAYA!!
i bought a kitty bling necklace...a domo-kun purse...
i lost my mom over there and when i found her she bought me this ribbon.
it has a cupcake on it...SORRY LUXMEE!!! SORRY I DIDNT KNOW SHE'D BUY THAT.
i mean she likes ribbons but i didn't know it'd be a cupcake...
but yeah...............DOMO KUN ALL THE WAY!

mah

2008-06-28T08:16:00.000-07:00

kay so now i'm sitting in my living room, writing a new post..and watching tv.
and like WOAH its about this criminal thing its interesting :D
i studied for 1 and a half hours. this whole week i gotta study for like 3 hours..
): stressed. this show on channel E! is SO interesting :D
i wanna go to MKIS or ISKL...i dont know why its better than HERE.
ahhhh :(
i wanna new piercing :D

sweet dreams

2008-06-24T08:24:00.000-07:00

kayy so i just finished watching CSI:NY
my goshh so much suspense! can't wait for next episode, like who the eff is Mr 333?
aren't you curious? i am!
so now i'm thinking what to write, what to write what to write what to write.
ohh yeah, i'm starting to like Motion City Soundtracks song "lets get fucked up and die
i had it in my computer for like, a long time. Escape the Fate is loved by me♥♥
how am i gonna get to school tomorrow? ahhh embarassment? i don't know...
i'm gonna be so sad when Chua and Aditi's gone..Aditi's really nice, and her house was the first house i had a sleepover in like year 2.
And Chua, he's like the most awesome person in the histroy of "your awesome classmate is a famous youtuber" history! Chua, if you're reading this, I'm gonna miss you like shitttt man! We're like the I hate Acapulco and Chile (and you hate Lima) like shitttt man!
Everyone's leaving. I'm gonna be so sad. Chua's going to Tenby, then Canada while Aditi is going to someplace near Dubai. Poor girl, she gotta learn some Arabian! Lucky I know some..well I'm not that good but like still.
Guys, I seriously am gonna cry. Both of you made one difference and big happy part of my life.
Aditi- if it weren't for you, I wouldn't know what a sleepover was [well i was in Year 2, hah] and Lilo & Stich. You're the best! And you're awesome and you're sooo nice! Gonna miss you like fuck Aditi~
Chua- Seriously, even though sometimes when you can't keep a single secret, when it comes down to Acapulco/Chile/Lima/Borneo, we're like the people! I promise you even if I have amnesia or I lose half of my memory, I will still go on YouTube to see if you upload something new.

I'm gonna hug both of you 'till you guys get numb!
ILY BOTH! :D:D:D:DD:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
xx
p/s: Marilyn Manson isn't that bad I'm listening to his music :D

D:D

2008-06-24T04:17:00.000-07:00

i dont know what to feel.
today is his birthday, i gave a present with a card, my Seaweed the Otter/Dewgong.
and chocolate.
and i can't seem to forget the "OH THANK YOU"
i gave it without saying Happy Birthday as well.
but now i'm scared if people will start talking about me, or to the teacher ESCPECIALLY; the maths teacher.
LOL~ but oh well who gives?
i do. hahahahahaahahahhaah.
uhmmm first break was pretty funny. I stole a bit of Ashley's sandwich, so she was scolding me like shit while i was following along singing his birthday song. OH that rhymes!
24/06/1993? is it 1993? IDONTKNOWSIGH.
AHHHHHHHHHHH.
nevermind....i can live with embarassment...can i? HAHA i dont know what to say now!
i miss Seaweed, hope you take care of...him..her..IT.

changes

2008-06-23T03:26:00.001-07:00

i miss the old you.
you were shit nice
you were fun to talk to
i always thought you were the best guy in my year
and now you changed.
you're just a dick like everyone
you hate my guts & now i hate yours.
i don't know what now.
you changed.
from the most awesome guy friend to the biggest mother fucking dick alive.

I HATE YOU MY GUTS OUT, AND YOUR GUTS.

okayyy sooooooo
today was the field trip :]
we went to the ceramics place thingy thing
kinda fun..i wanna get my ceramic thingy soon!
cos well i love my creation <3
and yeah we had to eat over there it felt uncomfortable :(
meanwhile the seniors were in Aerospace eating at the canteen
NO FAIR.
>:(
ho yeah Chua & I, we saw a little baby boy who was so cute, well he was...poking a stick in to the dog's ass. See that is how a pedophile rapes a young child actually, but this time the pedophile was a kid and the rape victim..is a dog.
Suk han's lollipop got confiscated...pooooor girl :[
so yeah today was an OKAY day.

but holy shit tomorrow i love tomorrow.
24th June HERE I COME!
imma 24th October :D
anyways BYE 24th JUNE HERE I COME!!!! XD

honestly

2008-06-21T21:27:00.000-07:00

okayyy soo....
i'm listening to Cupid Missed his mark
this song is the shizz i lovee itt.
<3333
so yeah.
uhmmmmmm i wanna go to Suk Han's shop
its a boutique
and like Suk han's gonna be my model in my next photography for Flick
and THERE's BIG APPLE DONUGHTS THERE
i know fuckfuckfuck lucky bitches who live at Desa Park City
plus; there's Secret Recipe there.
i don't know..
i wanna be a Photographer :]
so far i have 20 something photos up on Flickr
and i think i pretty much gotta join Groups to get comments from people.
hmmmmmmmm what group is there to join
`sigh.
my blog entries are all boring
and i actually have time to go write in a blog.
lamelamelame
i should be studying.

stufffff

2008-06-21T07:46:00.000-07:00

so yeahhhhhhhh.
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
holy shit i needa pee and get my drink so BE RIGHT BACK

okay back. hah that was gay.
you know i find myself a really active kind of blogger.
cos like i update like 3423523453456324634624 times a day.
good righttt

you know WHATTT
i caught my little brother doing some video game martial arts move
it was COOL
& my other brother dancing
kinda gay, no offence HAHA

why oh why oh why
YOU KNOW WHATTTTTT?
wait lemme refresh
I ASKED MY MOM TO BRING HOME MY COOKIE
AND ALL MY BROTHERS FINISHED IT!
SHEESH. fucking fat asses mannn
oh well i still got this chinese fried rice.
i see tentacles ohhh its seafood there too!
haha that reminds me
one time i was so excited that my mom was making this carbonara alfredo thing
and i screamed when she put an ocotopus in
but it was still good though.
i wanna fast forward time to my birthday.
24th October HERE I COME

so months ago my clique's obsession was Korean.
NOW ITS THE BEATLES!
like seriously they're awesome.
RIP JOHN LENNON! :(
and CASEY CALVERT! (Hawthorne Heights)

Ob la di ob la da life goes on~~
okay i'm gonna youtube it!

----i should be studying. oh well.
x

i am back.

2008-06-19T03:14:00.000-07:00

yes i am back.

man, the previous entry (below)
i was like.
so
depressed paranoid sad angry happy (not really)
and yeah.

he was very cute today and yesterday and day before and last week and last last week

i'm going crazyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
how do people pronounce [cray-zeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee]

HELP.

2008-06-18T03:40:00.001-07:00

sigh
i do not like you!
what do i do, i dont wanna be so mean.
and he asks the exact words i ask goldenboy.

HELP.

2008-06-16T03:09:00.000-07:00

school is so bawring ---- 0:
im gonna die of boredome!
HO
ME
GAWD.
well i dont mean to sound so...how to say? uhm self concious? too confident?
well anyway, suk han told me she saw him like, look at me 4 times.
its not a lot..i think...well i dont know! its suk han's instincts!
sophie said so though,
well like they caught him while i was paying attention to monia who was calling me a frggin pedophile T____T
and now she thinks im not a virgin
is it me or does she not understand sarcasm?
im going crazy + tired.
some new kid tried out
and looks like to me that sita is going prrreeetttyyy crazy.....
ahahahahah my life gets a bit more..interesting...
ohmy god, arinah leaving, no more drama queen who is uber funny
):
well
nothing else there!
x
racheal x, [h e a r t]

TIRED

2008-06-15T06:02:00.000-07:00

so i finally finished my music project and maths homework
~YAY~
i went to some wedding, and like i was walking at the side of the road
and this car just VROOM and it hit my elbow
i nearly died homegawd
my bro was walking, then he turned around and the car vroomed
so if he didnt turn
he would be dead by now
I WANNA BLACK CAMERA!!!1
i forgot what its called
BUT I WANT IT!
my blog posts are so short!
i mean, theres nothing much to ACTUALLY write.
there IS news, but like..the news is not meant to be on the internet to be seen worldwide.
SIGH

2008-06-14T00:07:00.000-07:00

ahh i studied for 2 hours!
i need a break!
my mom only allows me to be on the computer for
30 minutes!
kill me kill me stab me at the back make sure i dont wake up
ah that was uber random.
i seriously wanna go out sometime~karaoke and stuff
thats golden.
anyone wanna tag in?

2008-06-13T00:16:00.000-07:00

well, so today my mom went to speak to the teachers.
they said my grades are falling.
so i dont get much internet time a day,
): nawww
so i havent told you,
about my cartilage piercing :D
i was a lil scared, but now it doesnt hurt at all
i wanna get a tragus piercing!
and maybe one day, oh one day, a belly one :D
urh there is nothing much to talk about anymore!
so
BYE

racheal x

dead shit bored.

2008-06-12T04:30:00.000-07:00

i am bored.
so,
new post.
so what has been happening these few weeks?
well two weeks ago, i saw the guy i like.
walking with another girl
i was with my friend, by the way.
& two of them kept telling me that the possibility that they were dating is.
HUUUGGGGEEEEEE.
so i got really, really worried.
but you know what?
two of my friends, (i swear, i didn't know) asked him if he was dating her.
he said, "no, i am not" . so yeah. i kinda threw away crap in my room.
so i don't know what happened to that girl.
she looked depressed some time ago.
DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG?
i just ruined someone's life, i think?

kay, so yesterday was fun. hung out with Dillon and Casper.
"dillon's house is on the 100th floor. when he goes home, he goes halfway the building, and halfway up the stairs. why did he do that?"
"because he couldnt reach the 100th floor button"

well actually i could be in that joke too.

oh, another one.
casper: there are 5 apples. i take two, how many do i have?
dillon: 3!

argh, evil monia. yesterday he was sitting at the bleachers. i was at the bus shelter.
and smart, oh smart monia COUGH said.
"hey balkis! arent you here to stare at his ASS? righttttTT????"
& YES he heard. he walked away.
BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD impression. no thank you so much MONIA!!!!
i gotta be normal and cool in front of him.
but how?

they are hilarious. ahaha. omgosh, casper called me Dillon No.2. am i THAT blur???
sigh.

OH superhero movie!!
well chan hee, chua & i stole sushi from Shogun. taste DELIFUCKINGLICIOUS!!!
i loveeee it. and superhero movie.

lemme see..
its been 8 and a half months, since i liked this guy. ARGH SO LONG MAN.
why did i like him again?? well he knows i exist, i know that. he is damn shy. well i am too.
im too scared of him~ i tried talking to him..like...once a 3 months? :D yes i pretty much suck, babe. did he eat the chocolate i gave? does he think im a emo fucktard? SHITEEEEEE. if only, oh gawd if only i was a mind reader. or i could at least dream about what he thinks. GAH! speaking of dreaming, i had a dream he wore soldier cargo pants. and the next day he was.

o.O weird.
well there is nothing else there to say, my son.
racheal x ily
x

catching up`

2008-06-12T04:07:00.000-07:00

well there is alot to write here.
lets just say my mom's gonna see the teacher tomorrow.
im not doing well in my subjects.
bad.
very bad.
very VERY bad.
sigh... help me!!

(:

2008-06-06T22:26:00.000-07:00

ok hello everyone
i am in one utama
and my internet back home is out
and i'm band from the internet
yes it sucks shit
chua is next to me screaming
okay
bye

bikini kills

2008-05-23T21:06:00.000-07:00

its finally the weekend, i can escape school YAY.
i don't have to be poisoned by [[jdhflsjha]] and yeah.
well school is so boring nowadays.
SIGH--.
what should i do in the weekend?

look for more more more bands
doodle abit.
take polaroids and edit in photoshop
stare in to space
practice confidence
facebook like mad
blogg like mad.

theres nothing much to do here. SIGH. ohmy god i found this new rad genre called Riot Grrrl. But it was created like, BEFORE I WAS BORN. Jack Off Jill was formed at 1992. I was born on 1994. Credits to Marilyn Manson for the name "Jack Off Jill". haha i was watching Marilyn Manson on YouTube && SHITE HE IS DAMN HORNY. No offence, but the music is really good. I was watching Tainted Love. Haha he is a horny old goth rocker who acts a bit rapper there.

nothing else, there.

higashnigafigaa!

2008-05-18T22:47:00.000-07:00

ashley es mi casa G, chris es mi casa, perro. VAMINOS PERRO!
ashley is my house G, chris is my house dog. Let's go Dog!
gangsta spanish bby!

haha ayesha told me i should make up a famous blog where people read.
that is a GOOD IDEA.
if i have fans, do I?
oh yeah you know what I used to have a fan club in a chinese school and I didn't even know the people there. it was kinda freaky to have bajillion fans you don't even know.

i have a speech to make.
fuck stereotypes and labels. nobody should be treated like mushroom soup.
there are people who actually get killed in mobs for being goth.
i get called a weirdo or a freak alot. i get used to it.
well to tell the truth, i never care what people think of me. i only care what he thinks.
i don't know why, i've gone crazy.

here's some quotes, memorable moments i can write. enjoy ;)

me: hey chris
chris: yeah?
me: wanna buy a hot korean platinum edition?
chris: no thanks, i got one.
me: oh a white girl platinum edition that comes with a bob?

ash: comes in average, platinum and GOLD edition!
me: with ramen coming out of his belly!

ash: korean platinum edition! the poof! with teleportation device! can go invisible!
me: buy before stocks last!

ash: oh so now you say you love woman?
ash: so now you l o v e him?
me: you think i'm lesbian?!

Zul: We must all work together yeah?
*the zul smile*
Zul: I am black! Saya adalah orang HITAM!
*the zul smile; people are laughing*
Rudy: Encik Zul are you black?
Zul: tsk. This is not black, this is KUNING LANGSAT

chris: yeah my brother pierced his nipple.
me: did you touch it?
chris: no that's like...incest
me: why do i always say the wrong things D:

suk han: i haven't ate birds nest in a while..yummy
me: omg you abuse animals?!!??!
chris: balkis birds nest is ginseng

me: so i'm wearing jean blahblah
ash: i'm wearing blahblah
suk han enters the conversation
suk han: huh where to what?
me: to the toilet.

Sophie: ahh year 5 is so memorable. i miss year 5.
Sita: remember when blahblahblah
5 minutes later
me: oh he's story is like the ugly duckling!!!!
no comment.

ho yeah, we're so rad baby.

so yeah nothing much happened these few days. today is wesak today. yay for the buddhist :)
i'm hungry. very hungry.

shit son! you know what happened?
like some couple both changed their sex, found each other and got married. like you know. the boy is the girl and the girl is the boy.
shit son!

i like happy tree friends and south park. they're awesome :D

ahhh nothing else much.
xxxooo

i need you to try and save me

2008-05-14T03:38:00.000-07:00

back from school...sigh stoned soo much in class.
GRRR. i didnt get my 100% certificate. what's the fucking point of coming to school when you dont get your certificate? even chua and sita didnt get theirs. NEXT TIME, IM NOT COMING TO SCHOOL 100%. gawdd. stupid teachers.
fuck it zakri .. why did he tell ashley everything in the wrong way???
i dont hate hate her ..i just got pissed that time what is his fucking problem sigh ...
well i aint continuing any of this bitching in this blog because. i dont wanna get expelled/suspended.
speaking of that, ms sheela said that i can get suspended/expelled if my shirt continues untucked.
SIGH~~

nothing else there,
except ...
i <3 you.
<3= love.

xxxxxx

we're not falling in love, we're falling apart

2008-05-13T05:23:00.000-07:00

sigh ... i'm bored ... :(
i love writing korean now :D
i love epik high & big bang
super junior and TVXQ is okay, but the guys there are UBER hot ... :D
my mom made me some mac and cheese...soo good (L)___(L)
i didnt write for quite a while so i'll just write quotes i randomly made out of the blue.

"friends are like boobs, they stick very close to you"

"digest your happiness into faeces"

& well the others, i have forgotten. ahaha...

razors & drugs; hammers & hearts.
nothing else there.

xxo

the truth about heaven

2008-05-10T04:59:00.000-07:00

ahh im back to liking harvest moon again! :D
my litte brother is a STUD
he got the hardest girl for red heart in WINTER.
theyre getting married on summer 28
its all thanks to mehh,
i like matchbook romance.
the end.
xxoxo

yahh bitch yahh

2008-05-09T04:31:00.000-07:00

its all decided :) well not really
i wanna grow my hair at least chest length. it'll take a few months
we had a last minute whole school assembly so..we had little time for science test, but oh well.
chan hee must've been mad at me :/ im too lazy to type why.
i wanna write something here, i am so tempted but i'd rather not.
we had malay today and SHIT
daniel PANGRAZIO WAS ACTUALLY doing his work.
the world is coming to an end.
im over-reacting.
so, for break-time.. i ate lasagna :D
maths nothing much.
just another BAWRING dayy.
so we got this taiko talk me, suki and joshy.
"yahh bitch yahh" no more yeahs :)
and we have a taiko icon.
our taiko walk is like...solja boy o___0
but the hand part is like hula hula
well of all the people who tried to NEARLY attack josh's foot, it was I who got it.
but didnt like, attack it.

lonely.

2008-04-26T03:21:00.000-07:00

[currently listening to Valentine - The Get Up Kids]

hello, viewer.
here i am, hibernating in a room, in front of a laptop, appearing offline and in my own world. just finished watching the OC season 3. yes im very slow and old.

the get up kids. they stopped making music like, four to five years ago. the song "Valentine" is a really nice and quite sad song to listen to. one of the lines are very..um predicting

"Valentine - The Get Up Kids"
it's words you forget to anniversary songs
the bottles bite back
your tolerance wrong
your good intentions count for little anymore
if you're sorry why wage war?
i'm not fully convinced that there's something wrong with this
could another point of view, biased and untrue, tear me away from you?
will you be my valentine if i'm a world away?
apologies are breaking me
the constants aren't so constant anymore
for two days i wait for calls to come through
tonight for me translates to yesterday to you
you bend and you wave when you're barely away
i wish i could say tonight that when you bend
and wave goodbye you'd take me with you

this song reminds me of that day. what was in my hands. how far i ran and the tears that streamed down when i thought i lost it. i remember the place where i gave it. and just one word got me going crazy. i hate the state i am in, even if it may sound like i'm the happiest girl ever. "thanks". i didnt say anything else after you said that. i didn't ask. i ran off. and i never got it out of my head until now. i'm a coward. a true big coward. a loser. i was never near what i wanted to be. i just want to be happy with who i am now, but i cant, because of whats going on in my family so far.

okays,
nothing else there.
xoxo

CALIFORNIAAAAAA

2008-04-24T04:14:00.000-07:00

Okay so, today, a last minute outing to Cineleisure. Ashley, Chris, Monia & Casper. I bet you all feel bad for me :P.
I'm the wheel of the boot of a four-wheel drive. Haha. Watched Over Her Dead Body, ate donughts (how do you spell it..) and that is all. I came back to watch my lovely OC. =)

Californiaaa
My favourite guys in the OC is Johnny Harper, Dennis "Chilli" something, TREY ATWOOD, & SETH COHEN. Well I love all of em. You know Johnny Harper (Ryan Donowho) is the drummer of a band called Pagoda. You know most of the names in the OC are the names of the friends of the director (Josh Scwartz) ..
DONT YOU THINK THAT SETH AND SUMMER ARE THE CUUUUUUTEST COUPLE IN THE OC. Well, no offence but Marissa and Ryan are a nice couple, just both have a thousand million issues. I feel bad for Trey, both him & Ryan were like...best friends. Okay, I shall stop blabbing about the OC.

UHM. NOTHING MUCH THEN.
the end.

xoxo

We're forever the sickest kids

2008-04-22T03:26:00.000-07:00

[currently listening to Miss Murder - AFI]
So I haven't posted in like, 5 days. Oh dear.. Well many stuff happened. Where can I start? I forgave Suk Han about Sunday, I couldnt be angry with her forever. :] nyaaa.
Suk Han thought me a few chinese words that chinese and lala girls write out a lot. Well its chinese.

Leng Lui - Pretty Girl
Xiao Lui - Small girl
Sot Sot Lui - Crazy girl
Bao Bei - Baby
Lao Gong - Husband

Wah...very interesting loorr... So my dad just did surgery, and he has one eye now. Well its an eye patch, pretty cool though. No, not really. He is my father, eye or no eye, leg or no leg, (well he has a leg) I watched a lot of The OC.
Today we planned Chris's suprise party, but many people couldn't turn up. Oh well. I woke up at 10:30 in the morning, but I was meant to be there at 10 am. AIYAH...silly me... I rushed to Villamas, picked up Sukhan and went straight to 1U. We ate at McDonald's. We walked to the cybercafe and played and played liked shit. Well I did. I was very obsessed with this game called Paparazzi. I wanted to play O2Jam though....aish.. I played that game for 2-3 hours. I reached until like, level 7 or 8. Then I played GTA. I was practically screaming in the cybercafe, I wonder what the workers were thinking. :P I fit in one of those merry-go-round thingy. I'll steal it from Ash's blog :P EVIL MEE

I was very upset when my computer was gonna shut down...

Me in the cute little cab. OMG. DEATH CAB FOR KOREANS!

Cineleisure

2008-04-16T07:15:00.001-07:00

[listening to A hole in the world - Thursday]

Okay, so today we went to Cineleisure. Sorry if you guys didn't get to go, Ash (the host) said that six is quite alot of people. IT WAS FUUUNNNNNN. I got lost in Cineleisure. Funny, I don't get lost in 1Utama and KLCC. So we went to Jukebox Karaoke and Pool. I can read grafiti :D Eww some weird malay lepakers was like watching us sing and hello-ing Ashley. Oh right, I didn't say who was going. Umm..it was Me, Ash, Monia, Qahmil, Chris, Joshua. Umm long story about the people going! We watched 27 dresses. There was almost no one there so we sat anywhere we wanted. HAHAH towards the end Chris and Josh kept calling me the bride (==") and uhh Mr Anonymous was the groom. HAHA Kunaal was the maid guy. And who was the maid girl I forgot. And all those 27 girls in dresses were the Yr 8 girls. == Those two I tell you. We were poking throughout the whole movie, quite loud, I wonder if people complained.

After that we went for lunch at Little Penang. TT_________TT i had to eat fried rice with chopsticks. Everyone was complaining my strange obsession with Shisha, tatoos and piercings. Nah I don't do those stuff :) i'm innnnnoocennt. AND CLEANNN! LETS DO DRUGS! lol jkjk

hmmm i wanted to eat korean bbq though. Joshua kept telling me that I hold chopsticks like Mr anonymous ==
ok gotta knock off with mr anonymous talking.

Then yeah we all went home and stuff. I think Chris and Qahmil was last to leave. I saw them when I was going to the car park.

I had a fight with my brother again. He doesn't understand how much I hate him. Half the reason why I went out is so that he can use the computer but nooo he just started. IDIOTSSS

OH YEAH HOW CAN I BE DUMB I DIDNT TAKE PICTURES FOR MEMORIES. OH WELL. ==

xoxo

Pawwtyy

2008-04-06T01:57:00.000-07:00

[listening to Decembers - Hawthorne Heights
Okays its my first entry. Yesterday was Sophie's birthday party; it was so fun. There was tons of games and we even played this game that we played when we were like what? Year 2 I think? So fun..and I still want more apple crumbles. We were like, on the roof of her house, trying to get the perfect picture. The sky was nice it made feel like eating chocolate. =____=

My Chinese *coughcough*Korean*coughcough* friend name Suk han

Its time to eat.

Haha Christina & the huge spoon

After many many tries we finally got the picture.

This is so High School Musical.

AAAHHH her presents were adorable. Hon and Moonka finally got a friend now.

xoxo